Being in a place called Fushimi, someone composed this on the spirit of the place:
菅原や伏見の暮に見わたせば霞にまがふ小初瀬の山
| sugaFara ya Fusimi no kure ni miwataseba kasumi ni magaFu woFatuse no yama |
When from the sedge fields Of Fushimi at evening time I gaze across, A mere haze does seem The mount of Hatsuse! |
Anonymous
Left (Win).
ほのかなる霞の末の荒小田に河づも春の暮れ恨むなり
| honokanaru kasumi no sue no araoda ni kawazu mo haru no kure uramunari |
Faintly Through the haze upon The unplanted paddy fields The frogs, too, spring’s Passing mourn. |
161
Right.
みがくれて井手の河づはすだけども浪のうへにぞ聲は聞ゆる
| migakurete ide no kawazu wa sudakedomo nami no ue ni zo koe wa kikoyuru |
Hidden in the waters, The frogs of Ide Swarm, yet Across the waves Come their cries. |
162
The Right wonder about the appropriateness of ‘through the haze upon’ (kasumi no sue), while the Left content themselves with saying the Right’s poem is ‘trite.’
Shunzei states that, ‘“Through the haze upon the unplanted paddy fields” (kasumi no sue no araoda) is a particularly desolate image, but I do wonder if it’s appropriate here. “Hidden in the waters, the frogs of Ide swarm” (migakurete ide no kawazu) certainly sounds as if it were based on a prior example, but I find myself unable to recall it at present. Having both “across the waves” (nami no ue) and “the frogs of Ide” (ide no kawazu), however, is excessive. The left seems the winner.’
Left (Tie).
をちかたやまだ見ぬ峰は霞にて猶花思ふ志賀の山越え
| ochikata ya mada minu mine wa kasumi nite nao hana omou shiga no yamagoe |
In the distance far As yet unseen peaks Are shrouded in the haze; Yet I think on blossom on The path across the Shiga Mountains. |
143
Right (Tie).
春深み花のさかりに成ぬれば雲を分け入る志賀の山越え
| haru fukami hana no sakari ni narinureba kumo o wakeiru shiga no yamagoe |
Spring is at its height, and The blossoms their peak Have reached, so I pass between the clouds On the path across the Shiga Mountains. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
144
The Right say that ‘shrouded in the haze’ (kasumi nite) in the Left’s poem is ‘somewhat grating on the ear’ [isasaka mimi ni tatsu], while the Left reply that the Right’s is ‘rather old-fashioned’ [furumekashiki] and ‘there would be people complaining it was similar to their own work!’
In response, Shunzei says, ‘The Left’s ‘shrouded in haze’ certainly is somewhat grating in form [mimi ni tatsubeku ya], but seeing blossom scattered on a mountain path and wondering about the situation on peaks ahead hidden in the haze, seems well in keeping with the conception of the topic [amari no kokoro ni ya haberan]. As for the Right, on first impression it is splendid [yū], and as for it seeming old-fashioned, and people complaining about it: well, I wonder if there ever was anyone who composed in such a manner [kayō no kokoro ni koso yomeru hai ni ya]? At the present time I have no recollection of anyone. Thus, I cannot decide on a winner between the two.’
Left.
霞かは花鶯にとぢられて春にこもれる宿の明ぼの
| kasumi ka wa hana uguisu ni tojirarete haru ni komoreru yado no akebono |
Is this haze? No, in blossom and warbler song Am I sealed; Shut in by springtime Is my home this dawn. |
115
Right (Win).
霞立つ末の松山ほのぼのと浪にはなるゝ橫雲の空
| kasumi tatsu sue no matsuyama honobono to nami ni hanaruru yokogumo no sora |
The hazes rise Around the pine-clad peak of Sué; Dimly Departing from the waves, Narrow clouds trail across the sky. |
116
The Right team have no particular remarks to make about the Left’s poem this round, but the Left state that the Right’s poem is ‘most satisfying.’
Shunzei’s judgement is: ‘The Left’s “Is this haze?” (kasumi ka wa) seems like it wants to be “Is this just haze?” (kasumi nomi ka wa). “In blossom and warbler song am I sealed” (hana uguisu ni tojirarete) and “my home this dawn” (yado no akebono) remind one of “the lofty palace of Shinsei stands behind warblers and blossom” and this is excellent. As for the Right’s poem, this is particularly moving, with its depiction of the scene “departing from the waves, narrow clouds trail across the sky” (nami ni hanaruru yokogumo no sora), recalling “the pine-clad peak of Sué” (sue no matsuyama). The poem does start with “hazes rise” (kasumi tatsu) and having “haze” (kasumi), “wave” (nami) and “cloud” (kumo) means the poem is somewhat overburdened with similar imagery. “Narrow clouds trail across the sky”, though, does make a particularly strong impression, and the Left’s poem is merely satisfying, as has been said. Thus, “my home this dawn” must lose, I think.’
Left (Tie).
立ちわたる霞ばかりはほのかにてそことも見えずあけぐれの空
| tachiwataru kasumi bakari wa honokanite soko tomo miezu akegure no sora |
The drifting, Misty haze Blurs all; Nowhere can I see The softly lightening sky. |
109
Right (Tie).
霞もや明けゆく空をおしむらん心ぼそげに立ちわたるかな
| kasumi mo ya akeyuku sora o oshimuran kokorobosogeni tachiwataru kana |
Does the haze, too, The lightening sky Regret? In sad solitude Does it cover all. |
110
The Right team state that, ‘the expression ‘softly lightening’ (akegure) gives the impression that the scene is rather earlier than dawn,’ to which the Left snap back that ‘sad solitude’ (kokorobosogeni) is ‘puerile.’
Shunzei’s judgement is, ‘The comments by both teams are apt. The poems seem of equivalent quality.’
Left (Tie).
はるばると荻の燒原立ひばり霞のうちに聲あがるなり
| harubaru to ogi no yakehara tatsu hibari kasumi no uchi ni koe agarunari |
Into the distance, far, The silver-grass plain is aflame; A skylark takes flight, and From within the haze, its Song soars. |
93
Right (Tie).
春深き野邊の霞の下風に吹かれてあがる夕雲雀哉
| haru fukaki nobe no kasumi no shita kaze ni fukarete agaru yū hibari kana |
Now is the height of spring, and Haze lies o’er the plains; The breeze beneath Gusts, lifting A skylark, at eventide. |
94
The Right have no comments to make about the Left’s poem, but the Left say they are ‘unused to hearing’ the expression ‘breeze beneath the haze’ (kasumi no shita kaze), and then continue to ask, facetiously, ‘Do you mean to say that skylarks don’t soar without a breeze?’ The Right reply that, ‘when the wind is blowing gently, it appears as if the bird is lifted by it – that is the scene.’
Shunzei states that Left’s poem, with its essence of the skylark’s call emerging from the haze is ‘truly charming’. He did ‘wonder’ about the Right’s essence of the bird being lifted by the breeze, can see the scene of a gentle ‘breeze beneath the haze across the plains’ (nobe no kasumi no shita kaze), and is attracted by both sides’ poems. Thus, there are no winners or losers this round.
Left (Win).
片岡の霞も深き木隱れに朝日待つまの雲雀鳴くなり
| kataoka no kasumi mo fukaki kogakure ni asahi matsu ma no hibari nakunari |
At Kataoka The haze is deep upon The shade of the concealing trees; Awaiting dawn’s first light, A skylark sings. |
91
Right.
野邊見ればあがる雲雀も今はとて淺茅に落つる夕暮の空
| nobe mireba agaru hibari mo ima wa tote asaji ni otsuru yūgure no sora |
Looking out across the plain, A soaring skylark Seizes the second To plunge among the cogon-grass From the evening sky. |
92
Neither team has any criticisms to make of the other’s poem.
Shunzei states that, ‘Left and Right deal with the skylark at morning and evening respectively. Both poems are alike in content, yet the Right’s poem conveys a particularly desolate feeling. Why should this be? Once more, the Left is the victor.’ Commentators are divided as to whether in this judgement he is suggesting that loneliness is an inappropriate emotion to convey in a skylark-themed poem, or whether, knowing that the Left’s poem was composed by Fujiwara no Yoshitsune, the host of the competition and the highest-ranking person present, he is simply flattering a powerful man’s work.
Left (Win).
冬枯れの芝生が下に住みしかど春は雲ゐにあがる雲雀か
| fuyugare no shibafu ga shita ni sumishikado haru wa kumoi ni agaru hibari ka |
Winter-burned The greensward, and beneath it Dwelling, yet With springtime to the skies Ascending, ‘tis the skylark. |
87
Right.
雲雀あがる春の燒野の末遠み都のかたは霞なりけり
| hibari agaru haru no yakeno no sue tōmi miyako no kata wa kasumi narikeri |
Skylarks soar above The springtime stubble burned fields; To the distance far Towards the capital, all With haze is covered. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
88
The Right state that the Left’s poem ‘would probably be better’ without the final ka (the use of this particle, marking rhetorical tone, was considered old-fashioned by the time the poem was written, and this old-fashioned air is what the Right are criticising). The Left reply that the final two stanzas of the Right’s poem ‘are not effective’, probably suggesting that the poem implies the capital is on fire, rather than simply being concealed by smoke from stubble-burning.
Shunzei merely remarks that the Left’s criticisms are ‘apposite, in general’ and awards them the victory.
Left.
武蔵野に雉も妻やこもるらんけふの煙の下に鳴なり
| musashino ni kigisu mo tsuma mo ya komoruran kyō no kemuri no shita ni nakunari |
Upon Musashi Plain Is the cock pheasant’s hen, also, Concealed? For today from beneath The smoke come plaintive cries… |
81
Right (Win).
妻戀のきゞす鳴なり朝霞晴るればやがて草隱れつゝ
| tsuma koi no kigisu nakunari asa kasumi harureba yagate kusagakuretsutsu |
Longing for his hen The pheasant calls; When morning’s haze Has cleared, how swiftly He hides among the grass. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
82
The Right comment that the Left’s poem resembles Minamoto no Yorimasa’s poem:
霞をや煙と見えん武蔵野に妻もこもれる雉鳴くなり
| kasumi wo ya kemuri to mien musasino ni tuma mo komoreru kigisu nakunari |
The haze Does seem as smoke; On Musashino Plain With his hen hidden A pheasant calls. |
The Left snap back that as Yorimasa’s poem is not included in the imperial anthologies, they could not have seen it, and in any case, what sort of criticism is it to say that it ‘resembles Yorimasa’s poem?’ As for the Right’s poem, ‘do pheasants always hide in the grass come the morning?’
Shunzei comments that it is ‘a bit much’ to avoid Yorimasa’s poem altogether. Although he does then go on to say that ‘there’s no reason to strong arm in examples’ of poems not in the imperial anthologies. However, ‘what’s the point’ of associating ‘today’ (kyō) so strongly with ‘smoke’ (kemuri)? (It was supposed to be used only for particular days, such as the first day of spring.) In the Right’s poem ‘When morning’s haze/Has cleared, how swiftly’ (asa kasumi/harureba yagate) ‘has nothing needing criticism about it’, so the their poem is superior this round.
Left (Win).
春山の霞のうちに鳴く雉思ふ心をよそに知れとや
| haru yama no kasumi no uchi ni naku kigisu omou kokoro wo yoso ni shire to ya |
In the springtime mountain Haze A pheasant calls, His longing to the distance Must he wish to make known… |
77
Right.
忍あまり人に知れつゝ鳴く雉その妻戀のほどよいかにぞ
| shinobi amari hito ni shiretsutsu naku kigisu sono tsuma koi no hodo yo ika ni zo |
Too much to conceal, so To all must he tell it, A calling pheasant: His fondness for his hen, How great must it be? |
78
The Right team query why mountains are singled out in the Left’s poem, while the Left say that it is ‘unimpressive’ to conclude a poem ‘How great must it be?’ (ika ni zo) after beginning it with ‘Too much to conceal’ (shinobi amari).
Shunzei starts by addressing the Right’s question, stating that it is ‘perfectly normal’ for pheasants to call from mountains and meadows in springtime, and it is not the case that a poem on the theme of pheasants has to contain a reference to meadows. As for the final line of the poem, ‘Must he wish to make known’ (shire to ya), ‘there have, of late, been some who have a liking for this form of expression,’ but ‘it is not particularly desirable.’ The Right’s expression, ‘To all must he tell it’ (hito ni shiretsutsu) was old-fashioned, but ‘failed to sound impressive.’ In addition, the final line was ‘not satisfactory,’ whereas the initial line of the Left’s poem was ‘not bad’ (the commentators suggest Shunzei is referring to the image of a pheasant calling from the concealment of the mountain mists here), and so they must be the winner.