Left (Tie).
故郷を出でしにまさる涙かな嵐の枕夢に別れて
furusato ni
ideshi ni masaru
namida kana
arashi no makura
yume ni wakarete |
My home
I left in floods
Of tears;
The wild wind round my pillow
Breaks us apart in dreams… |
Lord Sada’ie
899
Right.
東路の夜半の眺めを語らなん都の山にかゝる月影
azumaji no
yowa no nagame o
kataranan
miyako no yama ni
kakaru tsukikage |
Upon the eastern roads
All night I turn my gaze –
Tell him that,
O moonlight, sinking
Toward the mountains round the capital! |
Nobusada
900
Both Left and Right say they find no faults.
In judgement: the Left starts with ‘My home I left in floods’ (furusato ni ideshi ni masaru) and concludes with ‘the wild wind round my pillow breaks us apart in dreams’ (arashi no makura yume ni wakarete) – this is a form of words the quality of which I am entirely unable to convey with my own clumsy expressions, but the Right’s ‘O moonlight, sinking toward the mountains round the capital’ (miyako no yama ni kakaru tsukikage) is awash with a sense of tears, so it is most unclear which should win or lose. Both truly seem to reflect the conception of this topic ‘Love and Travel’ well. The poems have been so good every round that my brush is drenched with this old man’s tears, and I can find no other way to express it.
Left (Tie).
象潟や妹戀ひしらにさ寢る夜の磯の寢覺に月傾きぬ
kisakata ya
koishirani
sanuru yo no
iso no nezame ni
tsuki katabukinu |
In Kisakata and
In love;
I sleep the night away, and
Awaking on the rocky shore
Behold the moon descending. |
Kenshō
897
Right.
清見潟岩敷く袖の浪の上に思ふもわびし君が面影
kiyomigata
iwa shiku sode no
nami no ue ni
omou mo wabishi
kimi ga omokage |
At Kiyomigata
Sleeves spread atop the rocks,
Waves breaking atop them;
Heart filled with pain
At the memory of your face… |
Jakuren
898
Left and Right both state that the opposing poem is pretentious.
In judgement: the Left’s poem seems well-constructed in its initial and final sections. However, as in Mototoshi’s poem long ago, ‘breaking a stem of miscanthus on the beach at Ise’, this seems to be a case of poetic allusion. The Right’s ‘Sleeves spread atop the rocks, waves breaking atop them’ (iwa shiku sode no nami no ue) seems to have been newly composed and seems elegant, but the final section is somewhat inferior. The Left has beginning and end matching. The Right has a superior initial section, but an inferior final one. Thus, the round ties.
Left (Win).
旅寢する我をば床の主にて枕に宿る小夜の面影
tabinesuru
ware oba toko no
aruji nite
makura ni yadoru
sayo no omokage |
When sleeping on my travels
I of my bedding
Am master!
Lodging by my pillow is
A face from a night too brief… |
Lord Ari’ie
895
Right.
まどろまぬその夜な夜なを數ふれば夢路も遠き草枕哉
madoromanu
sono yona yona o
kazoureba
yumeji mo tōki
kusamakura kana |
Unable to even doze
Night after night
I count them up, and
The path of dreams gets more
Distant from my grassy pillow. |
Lord Takanobu
896
The Right state: the Left’s poem seems fine. The Left state: we find no faults to mention.
In judgement: the Right’s ‘the path of dreams gets more distant’ (yumeji mo tōki) sounds elegant, but the Left’s poem has already been assessed as ‘fine’ in the comments by the gentlemen of the Right. This round I will leave the judgement in their hands and make the Left the winner.
Left (Tie).
思ひをく人ある身にはやがてこの旅の道こそ戀路なりけれ
omoi’oku
hito aru mi ni wa
yagate kono
tabi no michi koso
koiji narikere |
Leaving behind one
In my thoughts, for me
All these
Roads I tread are but
The paths of love… |
Lord Kanemune
893
Right.
變り行く涙の色ぞあはれなる草の枕の日數知られて
kawariyuku
namida no iro zo
awarenaru
kusa no makura no
hikazu shirarete |
The shifting
Teardrops’ shades
Touch me deeply;
Pillowed on the grasses
And thinking on the days away… |
Ietaka
894
Both Left and Right say together: we can see no faults to mention.
In judgement: the Left’s poem is charming in style. The conception of the Right’s ‘teardrops’ shades’ (namida no iro) shifting is elegant, but both poems seem to be simply lamenting that one has gone on a journey, and there is little conception of love in them. They are equivalent and the round should tie.
Left (Win).
都にて馴れにし物をひとり寢の片敷く袖は何かさびしき
miyako nite
narenishi mono o
hitori ne no
katashiku sode wa
nani ka sabishiki |
In the capital
I grew accustomed to it, but
Sleeping alone
With only a single sleeve spread out
Is somehow sad… |
Lord Suetsune
891
Right.
妹だにも待つとし聞かば小余綾のいそぐ舟路も嬉しからまし
imo dani mo
matsu to shi kikaba
koyurugi no
isogu funaji mo
ureshikaramashi |
That girl of yours
Awaits you – were I to hear that,
From Koyurugi’s
Rocky shore in haste I’d go, even
The sea-lanes filled with joy! |
The Provisional Master of the Empress Household Office.
892
The Right state: the Left’s poem lacks the essence of love on a journey, and even the sense of sorrow seems insufficient. The Left state: the Right’s poem has no particular faults.
In judgement: what do the Right mean by saying the Left ‘lack the essence of love on a journey’? And is it really right that ‘is somehow sad’ (nani ka sabishiki) is insufficient? The poem is composed to give an impression of someone fooling themselves. The Right’s ‘Koyurugi’ is certainly not an expression which I have not come across. However, the Left should win.
Left (Win).
枕にも跡にも露の玉散りてひとり起きゐる小夜の中山
makura ni mo
ato ni mo tsuyu no
tama chirite
hitori oki’iru
sayo no naka yama |
Upon my pillow and
My foot prints both, dew
Drops have fallen
Awakening alone in
Sayo-no-Nakayama. |
A Servant Girl
889
Right.
草枕ひとりあかしの浦風にいとゞ涙ぞ落ちまさりける
kusamakura
hitori akashi no
ura kaze ni
itodo namida zo
ochimasarikeru |
Pillowed on the grass,
Alone at dawn in Akashi,
The breeze from the bay
Makes even more tears
Fall. |
Lord Tsune’ie.
890
The Right state they have no criticisms of the Left’s poem. The Left merely say that the Right’s poem is ‘old-fashioned’.
Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘dew drops’ (tsuyu no tama) falling so widely at Sayo-no-Nakayama one can surmise to be deeply expressive of the concept of travel. The Right’s Akashi Bay is a place strongly associated with the sad sound of the wind and the waves, but the final ‘makes even more fall’ (ochimasarikeru) is insufficient. Thus, the Left should win.
'Simply moving and elegant'