Tag Archives: pillow

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 49

Round Twenty-Four

Left (Win)

かぜのおとにわきぞかねましまつがねのまくらにもらぬしぐれなりせば

kaze no oto ni
waki zo kanemashi
matsu ga ne no
makura ni moranu
shigure nariseba
The gusts of wind
I cannot tell apart from
The rustle of the pines roots
For my pillow should no drips
From the shower fall…

Lord Sanefusa
97

Right

たびのいほはあらしにたぐふよこしぐれしばのかこひにとまらざりけり

tabi no io wa
arashi ni taguu
yoko shigure
shiba no kakoi ni
tomarazarikeri
My traveller’s hut
Is lashed by the storm wind’s
Sideways showers—
The brushwood walls
Halt it not at all.

Lord Yorimasa
98

The conception and configuration of the poem of the Left, starting ‘I cannot tell apart from / The rustle of the pines’ and continuing ‘For my pillow should no drips / From the shower fall’ is, once again, truly exceptional! As for the poem of the Right, while it appears to have a charming style and use of diction, even if it is the case that ‘sideways showers’ are a genuine phenomenon, it fails to sound particularly elegant, doesn’t it. In addition, the latter section of the poem, ‘the brushwood walls’, feels slightly lacking in conception. Thus, I make the Left the winner.

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 41

Round Sixteen

Left

くさまくらたびねさびしきやまかげにこのはさそひてしぐれふるなり

kusamakura
tabine sabishiki
yamakage ni
ko no ha sasoite
shigure furunari
On a grassy pillow,
Dozing on my travels, lonely
In a mountain’s shade,
The rustling of the leaves invites
A shower to fall.

Hyōenosuke
81

Right (Win)

すみのえのまつがはひねをまくらにてなみうちそふるしぐれをぞきく

suminoe no
matsu ga haine o
makura nite
nami uchisouru
shigure o zo kiku
At Suminoe
Upon the crawling pine roots
Have I made my pillow, while
Laced with the breaking waves
I listen to the showers.

Lord Naganori
82

The Left’s configuration of ‘the rustling of the leaves invites’, while dozing on one’s journey in the shadow of a mountain, sounds pleasant. While I do wonder about the Right’s diction—concluding with ‘listen to the showers’—in addition to ‘laced with the breaking waves’ sounding pleasant, it also adds the conception of waves beneath ‘the pines of Suminoe’, doesn’t it. I make the Right the winner.

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 39

Round Fourteen

Left

こころあれやかきなくらしそはつしぐれまださしはてずしばのかりいほ

kokoro are ya
kaki na kurashi so
hatsushigure
mada sashihatezu
shiba no kari’io
Have some sympathy,
And bring no darkness,
O, first shower!
For I have yet to finish putting up
My crude brushwood hut…

Lord Suetsune
77

Right (Win)

すみよしのまつがしたねのたびまくらしぐれもかぜにききまがへつつ

sumiyoshi no
matsu ga shita ne no
tabimakura
shigure mo kaze ni
kikimagaetsutsu
At Sumiyoshi
Beneath the pines, their roots are
My journey-pillow, as
The shower, too, with the gusting wind
I hear blending together.

Takanobu
78

The Left’s latter section, which states that the poet has ‘yet to finish putting up’ his hut, has a truly charming configuration as a poem on the conception of travel, but the phrase ‘have some sympathy’ does not appear to be a conception which has prior precedent. It could be a way of expressing the emotion through the shower. As for the Right, while I do question the sound of ‘journey-pillow’, it is the case that in Cathay-style poems this appears, but what are we do to about the fact that this is not ‘pillow on my journey’, I wonder? The sequencing of ‘the shower, too, with the wind’ is pleasant, isn’t it. Thus, I make the Right the winner.

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 35

Round Ten

Left (Tie)

くさまくらしぐれもそでをぬらしけりみやこをこふるなみだならねど

kusamakura
shigure mo sode o
nurashikeri
miyako o kouru
namida naranedo
On a pillow of grass
The showers, too, my sleeves
Have soaked;
Longing for the capital
These tears are not, yet…

Hiromori
69

Right

かりいほさすならのからはのむらしぐれあはれはまきのおとばかりかは

kari’io sasu
nara no karawa no
murashigure
aware wa maki no
oto bakari ka wa
Erecting a crude hut,
The withered leaves of oak are
Struck by cloudbursts;
Does sadness in the evergreens’
Sound solely lie?

Dharma Master Chikyō
70

Both Left and Right appear to have elegant configuration and diction, but the Left seems to presents the soaking of sleeves by showers as something novel, while the Right gives a feeling that it is only the sound of evergreens that makes one sad. Thus, these tie.

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 31

Round Six

Left (Tie)

たびねするこやのしのやのひまをなみもらぬしぐれにぬるるそでかな

tabinesuru
koya no shinoya no
hima o nami
moranu shigure ni
nururu sode kana
Dozing on my journey
In Koya, beneath dwarf-bamboo thatch,
No gaps has it, so
No drips fall from the showers, yet
Still my sleeves are soaked!

Kunisuke
61

Right

しぐれつつものぞかなしきわすれぐさまくらにむすぶきしのたびねは

shiguretsutsu
mono zo kanashiki
wasuregusa
makura ni musubu
kishi no tabine wa
In the ever-falling showers,
I am sad, indeed, so
Of forgetful day-lily
My pillow will I weave,
Napping on my travels by the coast…

Horikawa
62

The Left’s poem is not bad in configuration and diction, but I would have preferred it had it said ‘no drips fall from the showers, too, yet’. As for the Right, saying that one is napping on one’s travels on the coast at Sumiyoshi, having woven a pillow from forgetful day-lilies does, indeed, sound evocative, but it would have been more so had there been a reason for the reference to day-lilies earlier in the poem. These tie, don’t they.

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 30

Round Five

Left (Win)

はれくもりしぐれするよはまつがねのまくらをえこそさだめざりけれ

harekumori
shiguresuru yo wa
matsu ga ne no
makura o e koso
sadamezarikere
Clear then clouded
With showers is the night,
When pine roots do
My pillow make
I cannot decide at all…[1]

Asamune
59

Right

かみなづきしぐるるよはのたびやかたもるとはなしにぬるるそでかな

kaminazuki
shigururu yowa no
tabiyakata
moru to wa nashi ni
nururu sode kana
In the Godless Month
Showers at midnight
At traveller’s lodge
Should drench me not, yet
Soaked are my sleeves! [2]

Kanetsuna
60

The style of both Left and Right sounds elegant. However, with regard to the Right’s poems, while I am well accustomed to hearing that one would not be drenched at a lodge, the combination of the diction of ‘showers’ and ‘soaked’ would have been better avoided. The conclusion of the Left, with ‘pine roots’ and sequencing sounds pleasant. Thus, the Left wins.


[1] Alluding to: Topic unknown. よひよひに枕さだめむ方もなしいかにねし夜か夢に見えけむ yoi yoi ni / makura sadamemu / kata mo nashi / ika ni neshi yo ka / yume ni miekemu ‘Night after night / To decide upon my pillow / I cannot do, at all / How can I sleep the night away / And see you in my dreams?’ Anonymous (KKS XI:  516)

[2] Alluding to: Composed in place of an islander from  Ulleungdo. 故郷有母秋風涙 旅館無人暮雨魂 kokyō ni haha ari aki no kaze no namida / ryokan ni hito nashi bō no Tamashii ‘My mother lies in my ancient home; my tears overflow with the autumn wind, as / Alone in my traveller’s lodgings, the rain at dusk draws out my soul.’ Tamenori (Shinsen rōeishū 606)

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 21

Round Nine

Left (Tie)

秋はぎを草の枕にむすびてや妻恋ひかねて鹿のふすらん

akihagi o
kusa no makura ni
musubite ya
tsuma koikanete
shika no fusuran
The autumn bush clover
For a grassy pillow
Has he woven—is that why
Unable to love his mate
The stag seems to lie?

Koreyuki
41

Right

妻こふる秋にしなればさをしかの床の山とてうちもふされじ

tsuma kouru
aki ni shi nareba
saoshika no
toko no yama tote
uchi mo fusareji
He yearns for his mate
In autumn, above all, so
In the stag’s
Bed among the mountains
He cannot lay him down, it seems.

Arifusa
42

The Left isn’t bad, but isn’t there Controller Kore’ie’s poem:

秋萩を草の枕にむすぶ夜はちかくもしかのこゑをきくかな

akihagi o
kusa no makura ni
musubu yo wa
chikaku mo shika no
koe o kiku kana
The autumn bush clover
For a grassy pillow
I weave tonight—
Close by, truly, a stag’s
Bell I hear! [1]

While there is this earlier example, neither core nor the conceptions of these poems are the same, and as the Right’s poem is not all that good, after careful consideration I make this a tie.


[1] On hearing a stag at his lodgings. KYS (3) III: 224

Daikōtaigōgū daijin kiyosuke-ason ke uta’awase 19

Round Nineteen

Left (Win)

うちはらふ枕のちりもかくれなくあれたる宿をてらす月影

uchiharau
makura no chiri mo
kakurenaku
aretaru yado o
terasu tsukikage
Needing to be swept away,
The dust upon my pillow
Cannot be concealed
In my dilapidated dwelling, when
The moonlight shines within…

Taifu
37

Right

秋の夜の月みる袖におく露やひるにかはれるしるしなるらん

aki no yo no
tsuki miru sode ni
oku tsuyu ya
hiru ni kawareru
shirushi naruran
On an autumn night
Upon my sleeves, when gazing at the moon,
Fall dewdrops—
That all is changed from daytime
Might they be a sign?

Yorisuke
38

In both the moon is bright, and I feel they reflect the essential meaning of the topic, but as its diction is currently slightly more familiar, I make the Left the winner. It would be possible to call this a tie, too, though.