Round Twenty-Four
Left (Win)
かぜのおとにわきぞかねましまつがねのまくらにもらぬしぐれなりせば
| kaze no oto ni waki zo kanemashi matsu ga ne no makura ni moranu shigure nariseba | The gusts of wind I cannot tell apart from The rustle of the pines roots For my pillow should no drips From the shower fall… |
Lord Sanefusa
97
Right
たびのいほはあらしにたぐふよこしぐれしばのかこひにとまらざりけり
| tabi no io wa arashi ni taguu yoko shigure shiba no kakoi ni tomarazarikeri | My traveller’s hut Is lashed by the storm wind’s Sideways showers— The brushwood walls Halt it not at all. |
Lord Yorimasa
98
The conception and configuration of the poem of the Left, starting ‘I cannot tell apart from / The rustle of the pines’ and continuing ‘For my pillow should no drips / From the shower fall’ is, once again, truly exceptional! As for the poem of the Right, while it appears to have a charming style and use of diction, even if it is the case that ‘sideways showers’ are a genuine phenomenon, it fails to sound particularly elegant, doesn’t it. In addition, the latter section of the poem, ‘the brushwood walls’, feels slightly lacking in conception. Thus, I make the Left the winner.
Round Seven
Left (Tie)
きしちかみたびねのとこをうつなみのかへるひまにぞしぐれとはしる
| kishi chikami tabine no toko o utsu nami no kaeru hima ni zo shigure to wa shiru | Close by the coast My journey’s bed is Struck by waves; In the space as they withdraw, I know that showers are falling. |
Dharma Master Yūsei
63
Right
しばのとをたたくあらしのおとにまたしぐれうちそふたびのよはかな
| shiba no to o tataku arashi no oto ni mata shigure uchisou tabi no yowa kana | Upon my brushwood door The storm wind came a’knocking; The sound then Laced with showers, At midnight on my travels! |
Norimori
64
In the Left’s poem, it sounds as if the shower is continuing to fall quietly, yet it then appears to have the conception that one knows the showers are falling in the gaps between the waves breaking. In the Right’s poem, ‘The storm wind came a’knocking; / The sound then’ sounds charming, but I do wonder about how it looks to have lines beginning beginning with both ‘brushwood door’ [shiba no to] and ‘showers’ [shigure]. Thus, again, these tie.
Left (Win)
たまがきにひかりさしそふゆふづくよかみにたむくるかげにやあるらむ
| tamagaki ni hikari sashisouru yūzukuyo kami ni tamukuru kage ni ya aruramu | The jewelled fences, Trailed with light, On an early moonlit evening: Is this to the Deity an offering Of light, I wonder? |
Lord Fujiwara no Kunisuke
Supernumerary Senior Secretary of the Empress Household Office
Exalted Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
39
Right
くもはらふあらしのみがく月にまたひかりをそふるあけのたまがき
| kumo harau arashi no migaku tsuki ni mata hikari o souru ake no tamagaki | Clouds swept away By the storm wind, polish The moon, so once more Light trails across The vermillion jewelled fences. |
Horikawa, from the Residence of the Former Chancellor[1]
40
The Left’s poem is extremely charming with the solicitousness it displays in the sequence ‘On an early moonlit evening: / Is this to the Deity an offering’, but it is truly regrettable that it does not use the full moon or that at the dawn. The Right’s poem focusses on ‘light trailing’ and, as I get the impression that I have heard this a lot recently, the earlier instances have said all there is to say here, so once more the overall style of the Left is superior.
[1] Zen-dajō daijin no ie Horikawa 前太政大臣家堀川
Left (Tie)
月さゆるつもりのうらのみづがきはふりしくゆきにいろもかはらず
| tsuki sayuru tsumori no ura no mizukaki wa furishiku yuki ni iro wa kawarazu | The moon, so chill, shines Upon the Bay of Tsumori, Where the honored sacred grounds, Spread with fallen snow Remain unchanged in hue. |
Taifu, in service to the Former Ise Virgin[i]
33
Right
あらしふくまつのこずゑにきりはれてかみもこころやすみのえの月
| arashi fuku matsu no kozue ni kiri harete kami mo kokoro ya suminoe no tsuki | The storm wind blows Across the treetops of the pines, Clearing the mists away— I wonder, is the Deity’s heart at Suminoe beneath the moon? |
Lord Fujiwara no Sadanaga
Junior Assistant Minister of Central Affairs
Exalted Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[ii]
34
The Left’s poem appears to be about chill fallen snow spread upon Tsumori Bay, so in saying that the waters bounding the sacred grounds cannot conceal the hue, it appears to be saying that the moon’s light is white, but I wonder if the diction is a bit insufficient to convey this? It seems to me that it simply says that although snow has fallen on the waters bounding the sacred grounds, their hue has not changed—doesn’t it? As for the Right’s poem, I can say that its conception and configuration are pleasant, but it begins with ‘the storm wind blows’ and one cannot say ‘storm wind’ along with ‘beach pines’. One can understand this based on the poem ‘Yes, the mountain wind / Is aptly named “Storm”‘. Still, the poem’s configuration does appear pleasant. Again, I make this a tie.
[i] Zen-saigū no Taifu 前斎宮大輔
[ii] Jūgoige-gyō nakatsukasa no shō Fujiwara ason Sadanaga 従五位下行中務少輔藤原朝臣定長
Round Four
Left
さをしかのなくねはよそにききつれど涙は袖の物にぞ有りける
| saoshika no naku ne wa yoso ni kikitsuredo namida wa sode no mono ni zo arikeru | The stag’s Sad bell in the distance Did I hear, yet still My tears my sleeves Have covered. |
Sadanaga
31
Right (Win)
山たかみおろすあらしやよわるらんかすかに成りぬさをしかの声
| yama takami orosu arashi ya yowaruran kasuka ni narinu saoshika no koe | From the mountain’s heights Descending, has the storm wind Weakened? Faintly comes The stag’s bell. |
Lord Suetsune
32
I do wonder about the Left, given that there appears to be a poem by the late Lord Toshiyori:
さをしかのなくねは野べにきこゆれどなみだは床の物にぞ有りける
| saoshika no naku ne wa nobe ni kikoyuredo namida wa toko no mono ni zo arikeru[1] | The stag’s Sad bell upon the plain I heard, yet My tears my bed Have covered. |
I am a little leery of the Right’s central line, but overall it is not the case that this poem lacks conception, so it should win.
[1] KYS (3) III: 225 Composed on ‘listening to stags in a hut in the fields’. Also SZS V: 310 ‘Composed when he heard a stag belling while at a mountain retreat in Tanakami’. Also Sanboku kikashū 451 ‘Listening to stags in a hut in the fields’.
Round Twenty-One
Left (Win)
小倉山木木のもみぢのくれなゐはみねの嵐のおろすなりけり
| ogurayama kigi no momiji no kurenai wa mine no arashi no orosu narikeri | On gloomy Mount Ogura The leaves upon the trees, So scarlet, By the storm wind from the peak Are tossed down. |
Lord Kiyosuke
41
Right
ふかくあさきもみぢばながるあすか河ふちせは色にあらはれにけり
| fukaku asaki momijiba nagaru asukagawa fuchise wa iro ni arawarenikeri | Across both depths and shallows Flow the scarlet leaves On the Asuka river, Among the rapids and the pools Have they appeared. |
Shun’e
42
Neither of these is bad. The Right violates the five syllable pattern; the Left has no faults.
