yuki fukami shizu no fuseya mo uzumorete keburi bakari zo shirushi narikeru
Snow so deep that The peasants’ huts, too, Are buried, and The smoke, alone, is Their only sign!
Kinshige 45
Right
花の春もみぢの秋もしるかりし松の木ずゑもみえぬ白雪
hana no haru momiji no aki mo shirukarishi matsu no kozue mo mienu shirayuki
By blossom is spring, and By scarlet leaves is autumn Known— The treetops of the pines Invisible with snow, so white.
Kūnin 46
The Left poem’s conception of ‘sign of smoke’ sounds particularly profound. As for the Right, it is possible for enough snow to fall to conceal a pine’s lower leaves, too, so the poem does not sound satisfying.
uchiharau makura no chiri mo kakurenaku aretaru yado o terasu tsukikage
Needing to be swept away, The dust upon my pillow Cannot be concealed In my dilapidated dwelling, when The moonlight shines within…
Taifu 37
Right
秋の夜の月みる袖におく露やひるにかはれるしるしなるらん
aki no yo no tsuki miru sode ni oku tsuyu ya hiru ni kawareru shirushi naruran
On an autumn night Upon my sleeves, when gazing at the moon, Fall dewdrops— That all is changed from daytime Might they be a sign?
Yorisuke 38
In both the moon is bright, and I feel they reflect the essential meaning of the topic, but as its diction is currently slightly more familiar, I make the Left the winner. It would be possible to call this a tie, too, though.
Composed on the conception of visiting distant blossom in the mountains, on a day when he was due to return after paying a visit to the residence of the regent.
たづねつる花のあたりになりにけりにほふにしるしはるの山かぜ
tazuneturu Fana no atari ni narinikeri nioFu ni sirusi Fa Faru no yamakaze
I have paid a visit to A place of blossom Here; Of their scent a sign is carried On the spring mountain breezes.
