Round Eleven
Left (Both Judges – Tie)
こけのむす岩ねに残る八重ぎくはや千代さくとも君ぞみるべき
| koke no musu iwane ni nokoru yaegiku wa yachiyo saku tomo kimi zo mirubeki | Choked with moss are The crags where linger Eightfold chrysanthemums: E’en were they eight thousand ages a’bloom My Lord would have beheld them, no doubt! |
Lady Shinano
45
Right
霜がれに我ひとりとや白菊の色をかへても人にみすらん
| shimogare ni ware hitori to ya shiragiku no iro o kaetemo hito ni misuran | ‘Burned by frost ‘Tis me alone!’ thinks A white chrysanthemum, Changing hue To show to folk, for sure. |
Lord Tokimasa
46
Toshiyori states: I wonder if there is a poem as precedent for chrysanthemums lingering beneath moss-covered crags? If not, it’s a very crude expression. The ending of the poem is antiquated, too. As for the second poem ‘“Tis me alone!” thinks’ does not sound satisfactory. The assembled company settled the matter of the final ‘folk’, so I must make this a tie.
Mototoshi states: whether they are placed by a brushwood fence, or at the base of a crag, chrysanthemums feel like pines. As for the Right, having a chrysanthemum seem to think ‘‘tis me alone’ is speculative—had it been something like ‘this bloom opens’ then it would have been the poet’s thoughts. Neither of these is of quality to win or lose, so I make them a tie.
Round Nine
Left (M – Tie)
秋くれて千草の花は残らねど独うつろふ白菊のはな
| aki kurete chigusa no hana wa nokoranedo hitori utsurou shiragiku no hana | Autumn sinks to twilight, and Of a thousand blossoms Not one lingers, save Alone and fading A white chrysanthemum bloom. |
Lord Shigemoto
41
Right (T – Win)
かぎりなく君が千代経むしるしにや散残るらん宿のしらぎく
| kagirinaku kimi ga chiyo hemu shirushi ni ya chirinokoruran yado no shiragiku | That endless through A thousand ages will my Lord pass A sign there is: Not scattering and lingering White chrysanthemums at his house! |
Lord Tadataka
42
Toshiyori states: I don’t have much to point out about the poem on ‘autumn sinking to twilight’, except that it could have had ‘indeed, linger’ in place of ‘not one lingers, yet’ to lead to ‘alone and fading’. As for the second poem, there are no other examples of saying ‘chrysanthemums scatter’, yet I do wonder about how this sounds? Nevertheless, it has a conception of Felicitation and this makes it somehow superior.
Mototoshi states: the poems of Left and Right are of the same standard in both conception and diction, so it’s not possible to tell them apart. These, too, are of the same quality.
Round Eight
Left (T – Win; M – Tie)
冬枯にうつろひ残る白菊はうは葉に置ける霜かとぞみる
| fuyugare ni utsuroi nokoru shiragiku wa uwaba ni okeru shimo ka to zo miru | Sere in winter, Faded and lingering A white chrysanthemum as, Fallen upon its upper leaves, Frost does appear, perhaps? |
Lord Morikata
39
Right
露じもの暁置きのあさごとに移ひまさるしらぎくの花
| tsuyujimo no akatsuki oki no asa goto ni utsuroi masaru shiragiku no hana | Frosty dewdrops With the dawn fall—arising Every morning Fading fairer become The white chrysanthemum blooms. |
Lord Michitsune
40
Toshiyori states: I have the feeling that I have never heard the expression ‘sere in winter’, and I certainly have no recollection of it being in the Collection of a Myriad Leaves. The poem of the Right is smooth and extremely charming; I’m very familiar with the expression ‘dew fallen in the morning when I arise’, and here there seems to be some reason for it, doesn’t there! Still, the first poem is better.
Mototoshi states: the expression ‘faded and lingering’ is difficult to distinguish. In addition, saying ‘Fallen upon [the flower’s] upper leaves, / Frost’ is a severe misjudgment. The poem of the Right has the tautology ‘with the dawn fall’ and then ‘every morning’. Clearly neither of these appears to win or lose, so I make this a tie.
Round Seven
Left (M – Win)
霜がれの菊なかりせばいとどしく冬の籬やさびしからまし
| shimogare no kiku nakariseba itodoshiku fuyu no magaki ya sabishikaramashi | Were frost-burned Chrysanthemums there to be none, then How much more My brushwood fence in winter Lonely would be… |
Lord Sadanobu
37
Right (T – Win)
しも枯るるはじめをみずは白ぎくの移ふ色を惜まざらまし
| shimogaruru hajime o mizu wa shiragiku no utsurou iro o osamazaramashi | Frost-burns First sign I see not, so The white chrysanthemum’s Fading hues Cause me no regret at all… |
Lord Masamitsu
38
Toshiyori states: the assembled company asked how it can be possible that a brushwood fence in winter would not feel lonely after the chrysanthemums have withered, even granting that they are still there, and this is, of course, the case. In the depths of winter, one would not catch sight of any chrysanthemums. Although, it does sound as if you could could compose in this way, depending upon how early in the season it was. The second poem is of about the same quality, but I feel that I prefer it at the moment.
Mototoshi states: both poems are of the same quality, but ‘My brushwood fence in winter / Lonely would be’ really does make me realise that’s how it is.
Round Five
Left (T – Tie; M – Win)
秋はてて霜枯れぬれどきくの花残れる色は深くみえけり
| aki hatete shimogarenuredo kiku no hana nokoreru iro wa fukaku miekeri | With the end of autumn Burned by frost they are, yet The chrysanthemum blooms’ Lingering hues Appear all the deeper. |
Lady Shinano
33
Right
白ぎくも移ひにけりうき人のこころばかりとなにおもひけむ
| shiragiku mo utsuroinikeri ukibito no kokoro bakari to nani omoikemu | This white chrysanthemum, too Has faded; ‘tis simply as My cruel lady’s Heart— I wonder why would I think so? |
A Court Lady
34
Toshiyori states: the first poem has ‘With the end of autumn / Burned by frost they are’ and this gives the impression that there is nothing remaining. But saying that autumn has ended, yet one can still see the chrysanthemums, so, in the end, ‘hues appear all the deeper’ means there is a mismatch between the beginning and end of the poem. As for the second poem, it’s a commonplace style of composition to say that you despise someone who has forgotten you, but this is certainly a love poem, and it does not resemble a chrysanthemum one. Nevertheless, there’s nothing particular to point out in this poem and it has some vague parts, so I say this is a tie.
Mototoshi states: the phrase ‘Lingering hues / Appears all the deeper’ doesn’t say what these look like or how they appear. In addition, the poem’s style is not that superlative, and its diction seems halting. With that being said, however, the poem of the Right does not resemble one regretting the chrysanthemums in the slightest. It expresses the feelings of despite between a man and woman who have parted and become distant from each other using the metaphor of the chrysanthemum, and thus the conception of the topic lacks depth, so again the Left has to win.
Round Four
Left (M – Tie)
白砂の霜よに置きてみつれども移ふ菊はまがはざりけり
| shirotae no shimo yo ni okite mitsuredomo utsurou kiku wa magawazarikeri | White as mulberry cloth. Frost has fallen tonight I see, and yet The faded chrysanthemums I can clearly tell apart. |
Lord Masakane
31
Right (T – Win)
八重菊の花の袂をあかずとや霜のうはぎを猶かさぬらん
| yaegiku no hana no tamoto o akazu to ya shimo no uwagi o nao kasanuran | Of eightfold chrysanthemum Bloomed sleeves I cannot get my fill, but Is a frosty jacket Yet laid upon them? |
Lord Tadafusa
32
Toshiyori states: the assemble company have stated about the first poem that in the absence of the moon or the stars it would difficult to distinguish chrysanthemums from the frost, and it certainly sounds like this would be the case. In the latter poem, we need to think of who it is that is feeling that they cannot get their fill of bloomed sleeves—the person wearing them should be included, or if the chrysanthemums are, perhaps, the subject, then ‘eightfold chrysanthemum’ is an error. Even so, the style of the poem seems elevated.
Mototoshi states: the poem stating ‘White as mulberry cloth. / Frost has fallen tonight’ is a bit hackneyed, and it then continues ‘The faded chrysanthemums / I can clearly tell apart’—I question whether one would really mistake faded chrysanthemums and frost. As for the Right’s poem, which says ‘Bloomed sleeves / I cannot get my fill’, well, this really is difficult to grasp. I spent quite a bit of time going back and forth agonizing over whether these were a person’s sleeves or those of the chrysanthemum! I feel that the diction in both poems is skillful, but there’s a lack of necessary information, so it’s impossible to decide a winner or loser here.
