Left.
かねて思ふわりなかるべき名殘かな飽かれぬ花も根に歸りなば
| kanete omou warinakarubeki nagori kana akarenu hana mo ne ni kaerinaba |
Long have I thought that Hopeless would be My regret, Should the blooms – unsurfeited – Return to their roots. |
173
Right (Win).
わがおしむ歎きにそへて思ふかな花にをくるゝ春の心を
| wa ga oshimu nageki ni soete omou kana hana ni okururu haru no kokoro o |
Upon my regretful Sorrow is heaped Yet more grief: With the blossoms gone That is the sense of spring… |
174
The Right remark that ‘unsurfeited’ (akarenu) in the Left’s poem is ‘grating on the ear’, while the Left suggest that ‘upon my regretful’ (wa ga oshimu) in the Right’s is less than entirely admirable.
Shunzei contents himself with simply saying that, ‘The Left’s “unsurfeited” sounds worse than the Right’s “upon my regretful”.’