sayo fukete nezamezariseba hototogisu hitozute ni koso kikubekarikere
When brief night broke, and I failed to awaken to The cuckoo, Via a message, indeed, Was I able to hear it!
Tadami 27
Right
人ならばまててふべきをほととぎすふたこゑとだにきかですぎぬる
hito naraba mate chōbeki o hototogisu futa koe to dani kikade suginuru
Were you a man, ‘Wait!’ is what I’d tell you, O, cuckoo! For without even a second call For me to hear have you passed by.
Motozane 28
The Left’s poem, where the poet seems to awaken without a thought of hearing the cuckoo, is certainly somewhat odd. Nevertheless, the poem overall is charming. As for the Right’s poem, well, what is the poet trying to say by asking the cuckoo to wait when he will hear its first call, if it were a man? Is the conception, perhaps, for the cuckoo to wait a while? There’s not enough diction for the conception here, I feel. Both of these are about the same standard, so I make this a tie.
natsugoromo tachi’izuru kyō wa hanazakura katami no iro mo nugi ya kauran
Summer garb: Cut out from today, departing The blossom of the cherries’ Hues—a keepsake—, too, Will I put off and change?
Nakatsukasa
23
The Left’s poem gives the impression of the beginning of summer, but the Right’s ‘Sewn from today, departing’ suggests that it is the year that is doing so. In addition, it seems to use ‘put off and change’, and so sounds as if time has passed more swiftly than in the Left’s poem. Thus, because the poems’ quality is about the same, I make this a tie.
[1]Shuka 首夏. This Sinitic expression was also used to refer to the the Fourth Month.
hito shirezu au o matsu ma ni koishinaba nani ni kaetaru inochi to ka iwan
Unknown to all, While pining to meet with you Should I die of love, Then what compensation For my life might I request?
Hon’in Jijū 35
Right
ことならばくもゐの月となりななむこひしきかげやそらにみゆると
koto naraba kumoi no tsuki to nari na namu koishiki kage ya sora ni miyuru to
Should that be the case, then Above the clouds, the moon I would you become, that Your beloved light I would behold within the skies…
Nakatsukasa 36
The Left’s poem really tells it like it is! The Right’s poem seems to have identical characters beginning its first and fourth lines, and this is a bit distasteful. When I asked how this should be measured, neither Left nor Right said anything. Then the Left seemed to mutter, ‘My poem doesn’t use these characters,’ but I don’t see this as a fault worth mentioning, so thus I make this tie.
