Left.
霜降れば若紫の色映へて菊は老せぬ花にぞ有ける
shimo fureba wakamurasaki no iro haete kiku wa oisenu hana ni zo arikeru |
With frost-fall, A fresh violet Hue shines out; Chrysanthemums show not their age – Such blooms are they! |
497
Right (Win).
染めかふる籬の菊の紫は冬にうつろふ色にぞ有ける
somekauru magaki no kiku no murasaki wa fuyu ni utsurou iro ni zo arikeru |
Stained a different hue, The chrysanthemums by my lattice fence With violet Show the shift to winter – Such is their hue! |
498
Neither Left nor Right have any criticisms to make.
Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems are on ‘violet chrysanthemums’, and the Left’s ‘Chrysanthemums show not their age’ (kiku wa oisenu) is elegant [yū naru], but in terms of diction [kotoba] I find myself unable to accept [shokisubekarazu] ‘hue shines out’ (iro haete). The Right’s ‘Show the shift to winter – such is their hue!’ (fuyu ni utsurou iro ni zo arikeru), sounds pleasant [yoroshiku kikoe habere] and is in line with the Theory of the Five Elements. Violet is a colour obtained by adding black to red. Thus, it is a suitable hue to place between Autumn and Winter. The Right have composed upon such a conception most naturally [sono kokoro shizen ni yomaretaru]. It seems he is most knowledgeable about the elemental turning of the seasons [go gyō no rinten o shireru ni nitari]. The poem is pleasant in conception and configuration [kokoro sugata yoroshiki]. Again, the Right should win.