Winter II: 13

Left.

山里の寂しさ思ふ煙ゆへ絶え絶え立てる峯の椎柴

yamazato no
sabishisa omou
keburi yue
taedae tateru
mine no shiishiba
That mountain dwelling’s
Loneliness feeling,
The smoke,
Rising in sporadic strands:
The brushwood on the peak…

A Servant Girl.

565

Right (Win).

冬籠る草の戸ざしは霜枯れてま近き山の峯の椎柴

fuyugomoru
kusa no tozashi wa
shimogarete
majikaki yama no
mine no shiishiba
Sealed in winter
The blockading grasses are
Seared by frost, and
How much closer is the mountain
Peak’s brushwood.

Jakuren.

566

Both teams say that the conceptions of the two poems resemble each other closely [kokoro hōfutsu].

Shuzei’s judgement: The Left, by starting, ‘That mountain dwelling’s loneliness feeling, the smoke’ (yamazato no sabishisa omou keburi yue) sounds as if it is the brushwood itself which has some sensitivity to the situation, and are rising up from time to time. I wonder about that. The Right’s evergreen groves ‘nearing the mountain’ (majikaki yama) is what should win.

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