Category Archives: 1151-1200

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 35

Round Eleven

Left (Win)

をしみかねあかぬ名残のくるしきに入るまではみじ秋のよの月

oshimikane
akanu nagori no
kurushiki ni
iru made wa miji
aki no yo no tsuki
Unbearable regret,
Unending is a memento
Most painful—
I would not watch until it sets:
The moon this autumn night.

Kenshō
69

Right

月影のかたぶくかたにさしいればやどのうちにも霜ぞ置きける

tsukigage no
katabuku kata ni
sashi’ireba
yado no uchi ni mo
shimo zo okikeru
The moonlight as
It descends
Shines in, so
Within my lodging
Frost, indeed, has fallen.

Lord Yorisuke
70

The Left, saying that the setting of the moon is a painful memento, and thus not watching it until the end seems excessively topsy-turvy. The Right, saying that the setting moon enters one’s lodging, is both pretentious and misses the point—surely it depends on the construction of the house! This shows know knowledge of how diction should be used, so the Left has to win.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 34

Round Ten

Left

をぐらやま下ゆく水のさざれ石も数かくれなくてらす月かげ

ogurayama
shita yuku mizu no
sazare’ishi mo
kazu kakurenaku
terasu tsukikage
Beneath gloomy Mount Ogura
Flow waters full
Of pebbles,
Unable to conceal their numbers
In the shining moonlight.

Lord Kiyosuke
67

Right (Win)

あまの川とわたる月の影すみてにごれるよともみえぬ空かな

ama no kawa
towataru tsuki no
kage sumite
nigoreru yo tomo
mienu sora kana
Across the River of Heaven’s
Mouth passes the moon’s
Clear light—
Even this cloudy world
Does not appear so beneath this sky!

Shinkaku
68

There’s nothing to mention about the Left, and the same is the case for the Right, but for some reason should it win?

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 33

Round Nine

Left

影きよく月をよこぎるうき雲は秋の名をさへけがしつるかな

kage kiyoku
tsuki yokogiru
ukigumo wa
aki no na sae
kegashitsuru kana
The pure light of
The moon crossing go
The drifting clouds—
The very name of autumn
Have they besmirched!

Arifusa
65

Right (Win)

照る月を浪のうへにてみる時ぞますみのかがみいる心ちする

teru tsuki o
nami no ue nite
miru toki zo
masumi no kagami
iru kokochisuru
The shining moon
Rests atop the waves, and
When I gaze upon it,
Within the clearest of mirrors
Does it lie, I feel.

Narinaka

66

What to make of the sound of the Left’s ‘besmirched the very name of autumn’? The Right does not seem to differ markedly from the conception of ‘Hundredfold Polished Mirror’[1] where it says that the moon ‘atop the waves’ is ‘all apiece with the autumn waters’ deeps’, does it. The Right should win.


[1] This is a reference to a poem by Bai Juyi, Bailianjing 百練鏡, contained in the Collected Works of Master Bai (Hakushi monjū 白氏文集), about a mirror which had been polished a hundred times. Kiyosuke quotes from the poem in his judgement, referring to the following passage: 江心波上舟中鋳 五月五日日午時 瓊粉金膏磨瑩已 化為一片秋潭水 jiangxinbo shang zhou zhong zhu / wu yue wu ri ri wushi / qiong fen jin gao mo ying yi / hua wei yipian qiu tan shui ‘In a boat atop the waves at the heart of the Yangtse / At noon on the 5th day of the Fifth Month / Polished with gemmed powdered seashells in golden oil / ‘Tis transformed and becomes all apiece with the autumn waters’ deeps.’

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 32

Round Eight

Left (Win)

月影をまつとをしむと秋の夜はふたたび山の端こそつらけれ

tsukikage o
matsu to oshimu to
aki no yo wa
futatabi yama no
ha koso tsurakere
Moonlight
A’waiting brings regret
On autumn nights—
Twice the mountains’
Edge do I hate so!

Sadanaga
63

Right

吹きはらふ月のあたりの雲みれば春はいとひし風ぞうれしき

fukiharau
tsuki no atari no
kumo mireba
haru wa itoishi
kaze zo ureshiki
Blown away
From round the moon
The clouds I see, so
Hated in spring
The wind fills me with joy!

Koreyuki
64

The Right seems to be saying that clouds are blown away from round the moon, so it sounds as if the diction is reversed. Overall, it lacks soul. While the Left has an archaic conception, it should win.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 31

Round Seven

Left (Tie)

あまつほしありともみえぬ秋のよの月はすずしき光なりけり

ama tsu hoshi
ari tomo mienu
aki no yo no
tsuki wa suzushiki
hikari narikeri
Stars in the heavens
Appear there to be none on
An autumn night when
The moon a cool
Light sheds.

Kojijū
61

Right

さ夜ふくる空にきえゆく浮雲の名残もみえぬ秋のよの月

sayo fukuru
sora ni kieyuku
ukigumo no
nagori mo mienu
aki no yo no tsuki
As brief night wears on
Vanishing from the skies are
The drifting clouds,
Leaving no keepsake for
The moon this autumn night.

Moromitsu
62

The Left, in addition to suffering from the Tree-Bank fault,[1] compounds this by adding a further line so all the first three lines begin with the same sound. This has been noted as a fault in earlier poetry matches. The Right, too, mentions ‘night’ twice and this is a significant fault, but I am unable to grasp the sense of the Left’s poem, so it’s difficult to make a judgement between them.


[1] Ganjubyō 岸樹病 (‘Tree-Bank fault’): this was one of the four poetic faults identified in the poetic treatise Waka sakushiki 倭歌作式 (‘Code of Creation of Japanese Poetry’), attributed to Kisen 喜撰 (fl. 810-824), hence the treatise’s alternative title of Kisenshiki 喜撰式 (‘Kisen’s Selected Codes’). This attribution is widely believed to be spurious, however, and that the work was probably written in the mid-Heian period. Ganjubyō refers to beginning the first and second ‘lines’ of a waka with the same syllable, in this case ‘a’.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 30

Round Six

Left

しほ風の雲吹きはらふ秋のよは月すみわたる天のはしだて

shiokaze no
kumo fukiharau
aki no yo wa
tsuki sumiwataru
ama no hashidate
The tidewinds
Blow away the clouds
On an autumn night
The moon crossing clear above
Ama-no-hashidate…

Tamechika
59

Right (Win)

あかざりし花にたとへてながむれば月は心ぞすみまさりける

akazarishi
hana ni tatoete
nagamureba
tsuki wa kokoro zo
sumimasarikeru
A never sating
Blossom do I imagine it,
When gazing at
The moon, my heart is
Most wonderfully clear.

Lord Yorimasa
60

The Left: it is not possible to determine where the wind is blowing, yet saying ‘the tidewinds blow the clouds away’ conveys a different impression. The Right’s use of ‘imagine’ is unsatisfactory as a piece of diction, but this is not a significant fault, so it should win, I think.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 29

Round Five

Left

さやけさに又ことごともわすられてふた心なく月をこそみれ

sayakesa ni
mata kotogoto mo
wasurarete
futagokoro naku
tsuki o koso mire
In its pure clarity
Still, all other things
Are forgotten,
With no divisions in my heart
Do I view the moon!

Lord Suetsune
57

Right (Win)

いかで猶秋しも月のかかりけむみるほどあらじ夏のよならば

ikade nao
aki shimo tsuki no
kakarikemu
miru hodo araji
natsu no yo naraba
Why is it that always
In autumn, above all, the moon
Does seem to hang within the sky?
There’s no time to see it, perhaps,
On a summer night…

Lay Priest Sanekiyo
58

The Left’s configuration is entirely lacking in consistency and, in addition, fails to indicate a clear conception, so the Right must be declared the winner.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 28

Round Four

Left (Win)

月きよみかひのしらねをながむればいつかは雪に空は晴れける

tsuki kiyomi
kai no shirane o
nagamureba
itsuka wa yuki ni
sora wa harekeru
When at the moon, so clear,
Above the white peak of Kai
I gaze, I wonder
When the snow
Will clear from the skies…

Shun’e
55

Right

くまもなき月みるほどの心にてやがて此よをすぐしてしかな

kuma mo naki
tsuki miru hodo no
kokoro nite
yagate kono yo o
sugushiteshi kana
When the cloudless
Moon I see,
My heart
Longs within this world
To ever stay!

Lord Michiyoshi
56

While the Left does contain some feelings, these seem not to be apparent in its diction. When moonlight is confused with snow, then I would want the composition to be about a location which has none, but mentioning the ‘white peak of Kai’ makes it unclear because it sounds as the composition is about its snow. Dropping a reference to Mount Obasute and replacing it with the ‘white peak of Kai’ sounds absurd and puts me in mind of the judgement in the Poetry Match at the Palace in the Fields. With all that being said, the Right’s poem appears pointlessly pedestrian, so the Left should win, I think.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 27

Round Three

Left (Tie)

おきあかしくまなき月をながむれば野原の草の露もかくれず

oki’akashi
kumanaki tsuki o
nagamureba
nohara no kusa no
tsuyu mo kakurezu
Lying awake ‘til dawn, and
Upon the cloudless moon
A’gazing—
Upon the grasses o’er the plain
Not a single dewdrop is concealed.

Mikawa
53

Right

月をみて心をこよひつくすかなくまなき空は又もこそあれ

tsuki o mite
kokoro o koyoi
tsukusu kana
kumanaki sora wa
mata mo koso are
Seeing the moon,
Tonight, my heart
Exhausts!
The cloudless skies
Once more are such!

Lord Kinshige
54

The Left’s ‘lying awake ‘til dawn, gazing’ suggests that the poet is at their own residence, but then it finally turns out that they are on the plain – what to make of this? It’s also the case that the moon doesn’t necessarily always appear over the plains. This poem should really have included a clearer reason for the poet’s journey. As for the Right, while it isn’t bad, the final line certainly regrettable, so this round is a tie.

Daikōtaigōgū no suke taira no tsunemori-ason ke uta’awase 26

Round Two

Left (Win)

松浦ぶねあかしのしほに漕ぎとめよこよひの月はここにてをみむ

matsurabune
akashi no shio ni
kogitomeyo
koyoi no tsuki wa
koko nite o mimu
O, boat from Matsura,
Upon the tides of Akashi,
Halt your rowing!
For tonight, the moon
I would gaze upon from there…

Lord Tsunemori
51

Right

月影のさえゆくままにおく霜をおもひもあへず鐘やなるらん

tsukikage no
saeyuku mama ni
oku shimo o
omoi mo aezu
kane ya naruran
While the moonlight
Is so chill,
Is it of the falling frost
Quite heedless that
The bells are tolling?

Tōren
52

I wonder if the Right’s conception is that of the bells of Fengling? It appears to be said of them that they ‘rang of their own accord when frost fell’, or something like that. Hence, in the Cathay-style poem with the topic ‘the autumn moon seeming to be frost at night’ there is also the line ‘wouldn’t you have it make the Fengling bells ring out together?’ Here, our moonlight is being thought to be frost, and the bells are tolling in response to it. But, as bells are inanimate objects, it does not seem feasible to think that they would toll upon seeing frost. Thus, saying that they would view the moonlight as frost and heedlessly toll, is odd, I have to say. As for the Left, while there is no clear reason for the initial line, the remainder seems reasonable, and so I feel this should win.