Tag Archives: shio

Hon’in sadaijin-ke uta’awase 05

Orchids

Left

おぼつかなあきくるごとにふぢばかまたがためにとかつゆのそむらん

obotsukana
aki kuru goto ni
fujibakama
ta ga tame ni toka
tsuyu no somuran
How strange, that
Whenever autumn comes
Grow orchids—
For whose sake, I wonder,
Does the dewfall dye them?

9

Right

おくしもにいくしほそめてふぢばかまいまはかぎりとさきはじむらん

oku shimo ni
iku shio somete
fujibakama
ima wa kagiri to
sakihajimuran
The dewfall with
Many dippings dyes
The orchids—
Now that all is done
Might they begin to bloom.

10

Kanpyō no ōntoki chūgū uta’awase 7

Autumn

Round Seven

Left

秋山はからくれなゐに成りにけりいくしほしぐれふりてそめけん

akiyama wa
karakurenai ni
narinikeri
iku shio shigure
furite someken
The autumn mountains
To Cathay scarlet
Have turned;
How many dippings with drizzle
Have fallen to dye them so?

13[1]

Right (Win)

秋きぬとめにはさやかにみえねども風の音にぞおどろかれぬる

aki kinu to
me ni wa sayaka ni
mienedomo
kaze no oto ni zo
odorokarenuru
That autumn has come
With my eyes, clearly,
I cannot see, yet
The sound of the wind
Has startled me.

Fujiwara no Toshiyuki 14[2]


[1] Shokugosenshū VII: 429

[2] This poem was particularly highly evaluated and so is included in numerous other anthologies (Kokin rokujō I: 125), exemplary collections (Shinsen waka 2) and senka awase – contests assembled from prior poems (Shunzei sanjū roku nin uta’awase 61; Jidai fudō uta’awase 49).

Love X: 17

Left (Tie)
よそにやは釣する志賀の海人を見ん枕の下を知らせだにせば

yoso ni ya wa
tsuri suru shiga no
ama o min
makura no shita o
shirase dani seba
Unconnected with
Fishing diver-girls
At Shiga would I seem?
When what lies beneath my pillow
Is revealed…

Lord Ari’ie
1173

Right
潮たるる袖にあはれの深きより心に浮ぶ海人の釣舟

shio taruru
sode ni aware no
fukaki yori
kokoro ni ukabu
ama no tsuribune
Tide-spattered
Sleeves: my sorrow is
So deep that
Floating upon my heart is
A diver-girl’s fishing boat!

Nobusada
1174

Left and Right together state: no faults.

In judgement: the poem of the Left has ‘unconnected with fishing diver-girls at Shiga would I seem?’ (yoso ni ya wa tsuri suru shiga no ama o min) and the poem of the Right has ‘floating upon my heart is a diver-girl’s fishing boat!’ (kokoro ni ukabu ama no tsuribune): both have profound conception and their diction sounds pleasant, so it is difficult to divide them into superior and inferior works. Thus, I make this a tie.

Love VIII: 2

Left (Win)
今はさはあはれと思へ菅の根の長き心の程は見つらん

ima wa sa wa
aware to omoe
suga no ne no
nagaki kokoro no
hodo wa mitsuran
Now, indeed, let you
Think fondly of me!
The grasses’ roots run
Long, my heart’s
Love will you see…

Lord Suetsune
1023

Right
世とゝもにかはくまもなき我袖や潮干もわかぬ浪の下草

yo to tomo ni
kawaku ma mo naki
wa ga sode ya
shioi mo wakanu
nami no shitagusa
With the passing time,
Not a moment dry
Are my sleeves;
Low tide does not reveal
The seaweed beneath the waves…

Lord Takanobu
1024

The Right state: the Left’s poem has no faults to indicate. The Left state: the Right’s poem is clichéd.

In judgement: the Right, in addition to being clichéd, can say no more than that love means wet sleeves. The Left’s ‘grasses’ roots’ (suga no ne) is certainly better.

Love VII: 10

Left (Tie).
雲井まで續きて見ゆわたつ海の行衛知られぬ物思かな

kumoi made
tsuzukite miyu
wata tsu umi no
yukue shirarenu
mono’omoi kana
Beyond the clouds
My gaze goes on and on;
The endless sea:
What lies beyond is unknown
As my gloomy thoughts…

Lord Suetsune.
979

Right.
伊勢の海の潮瀬にさはぐさざれ石の砕けて物を思ふ比かな

ise no umi no
shiose ni sawagu
sazare’ishi no
kudakete mono o
omou koro kana
The sea at Ise:
Raging rapids with the tides,
Where pebbles
Shatter, gloom
Filling my thoughts these days…

Ietaka.
980

The Right state: the Left’s poem is clichéd. The Left state: the Right’s poem is that of Shigeyuki.

In judgement: the Left’s poem is clichéd, but in addition to this uses ‘goes on and on’ (tsuzukite), which is not something one should say. The Right’s poem is, indeed, overly close to Shigeyuki’s, so both Left and Right poem are deficient and lacking in any element allowing a win.