Left.
色いろの花ゆへ野邊に立出でし眺めまでこそ霜枯にけれ
| iroiro no hana yue nobe ni tachi’ideshi nagame made koso shimogarenikere |
Many were the shades Of blossom in the fields I went to see; Even that view, now, is completely Burned by frost. |
509
Right (Win).
冬更くる野邊を見るにも思出る心のうちは花ぞ色いろ
| fuyu fukuru nobe o miru ni mo omoi’izuru kokoro no uchi wa hana zo iroiro |
In the depths of winter Gazing o’er the fields What I recall Within my heart Are the blossoms’ many hues. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
510
The Right wonder about the appropriateness of having a ‘view’ (nagame) of frost burn. The Left suggest that ‘depths of winter’ sounds a poor expression [kikiyokarazu] [because ‘depths of night’ was a more standard usage].
Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems refer to the many colours (iroiro) of the blooms of autumn, and this is certainly not lacking in taste [yūnarazaru ni wa arazu]. When gazing over the frost-burned winter fields, saying ‘even that view’ (nagame made) is not a fault as such [toga nakarubekeredomo], but I feel it would be better to avoid encompassing everything within a ‘view’. On ‘depths of winter’ (fuyu fukuru), we have the same old opinion that it ‘sounds poor’ but, I ask you, what sounds poor about it? What is to be criticised in ‘depths of winter’? As a piece of diction, ‘depths’ (fukuru) can be used about anything. Thus, the Right must win.