Round Twenty-One
Left
ひさかたの月もひかりをやはらげてしめのうちにはすむにやあるらむ
| hisakata no tsuki mo hikari o yawaragete shime no uchi ni wa sumu ni ya aruramu | The eternal Moon, too, his light Has softened, that Within the sacred grounds Should be more clear, perhaps? |
Lord Fujiwara no Asamune
Supernumerary Governor of Suruga
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[1]
41
Right (Win)
月かげをゆきかとみればすみよしのあけのたまがきいろもかくれず
| tsukikage o yuki ka to mireba sumiyoshi no ake no tamagaki iro mo kakurezu | When, upon the moonlight, I looked and wondered if ‘twas snow, At Sumiyoshi The vermillion jewelled fences’ Hues were not concealed at all. |
Lord Fujiwara no Kanetsuna
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[2]
42
The Left’s ‘Moon, too, his light / Has softened’ and so forth seems a charming configuration, but it is unclear from this whether the moon is shining more gently within the sacred grounds. Although I do wonder about the sound of beginning with ‘I looked and wondered if ‘twas snow’ and abruptly ending with ‘Hues were not concealed at all’, the conception seems clearly expressed in the diction and so I make the Right the winner.
[1] Suruga gonkami jūgoige Fujiwara ason Asamune駿河権守従五位下藤原朝臣朝宗
[2] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Kanetsuna 散位従五位下藤原朝臣懐綱
Left (Tie)
てる月もおのがひかりやたむくらむしらゆふかくるすみよしのまつ
| teru tsuki mo ono ga hikari ya tamukuramu shirayū kakuru sumiyoshi no matsu | Does the shining moon Of his own light Make an offering? Sacred white streamers hung From the pines of Sumiyoshi. |
Lord Fujiwara no Koretsuna
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[i]
35
Right
かたそぎのゆきあはぬまよりもる月はしもにしもをやおきかさぬらむ
| katasogi no yukiawanu ma yori moru tsuki wa shimo ni shimo o ya okikasanuramu | The ridge poles Fail to meet and from the gaps Drips moonlight— Is it frost atop of frost A’falling? |
Lord Fujiwara no Suesada
Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[ii]
36
The Left appears elegant, but I do not feel that ‘his own’ is particularly appropriate here. The Right’s configuration of ‘Is it frost atop of frost’ seems charming. However, there is also the point that I sincerely feel that there is no good reason in the current composition to shoehorn in ‘The ridge poles / Fail to meet and from the gaps’, and thus these tie again.
[i] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Koretsuna散位従五位下藤原朝臣伊綱
[ii] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Suesada 散位従五位下藤原朝臣季定
Left (Tie)
すみよしのまつのこずゑにふるゆきのつもりまさるとみゆる月かげ
| sumiyoshi no matsu no kozue ni furu yuki no tsumorimasaru to miyuru tsukikage | Sumiyoshi’s Pines’ treetops have Fallen snow upon them, Piled even higher, It seems in the moonlight. |
Lord Taira no Hiromori
Senior Assistant Minister of Justice
Meagre Junior Fifth Rank, Lower Grade[i]
31
Right
すみよしのはままつがえをこすなみに月のしらゆふかけそへてけり
| sumiyoshi no hamamatsu ga e o kosu nami ni tsuki no shirayū kakesoetekeri | At Sumiyoshi The pine trees on the beach are Washed by waves, with The moon’s sacred streamers Hung, trailing, upon them. |
Grand Dharma Master Chikyō[ii]
32
Both Left and Right lack any particular defects and sound elegant—they tie.
[i] Jūgoige-shu gyōbu taifu Taira ason Hiromori 従五位下守刑部大輔平朝臣広盛
[ii] Daihōshi Chikyō大法師智経
Round Ten
Left (Tie)
まつもみなしらゆふかけてすみよしの月のひかりもかみさびにけり
| matsu mo mina shirayū kakete sumiyoshi no tsuki no hikari mo kamisabinikeri | The pine trees, every one, Are hung with sacred streamers— At Sumiyoshi Even the moon’s light Inspires awe. |
Hyōenosuke, in service to the Junior Consort
(formerly Handmaid Mikawa, in service at the Nijō Palace)[1]
19
Right
かたそぎのゆきあはぬまよりもる月をさえぬしもとやかみは見るらむ
| katasogi no yuki awanu ma yori moru tsuki o saenu shimo to ya kami wa miruramu | The ridge poles Fail to entwine, and from the gaps Drips moonlight— As chill-less frost, I wonder, Does the Deity regard it? |
Lord Fujiwara no Naganori
Supernumerary Minor Captain in the Inner Palace Guards, Left Division
Exalted Senior Fourth Rank, Lower Grade[2]
20
The Left’s poem appears to have a pleasant configuration with ‘Even the moon’s light / Inspires awe’. The poem of the Right, furthermore, has a charming-sounding sequence with ‘As chill-less frost, I wonder, / Does the Deity regard it?’ but in composition one usually states that the moon is fair precisely because of its chill. Thus, when one compares it to true frost, can one say that it lacks it? While I do feel that this is somewhat vague, both the poems appear to pleasant configurations, so I make this a tie.
[1] Nȳogo no ie Hyōenosuke moto nijōin Mikawa no maishi女御家兵衛佐元二条院参河内侍
[2] Shōyon’ige-gyō konoe gonshōjō Fujiwara ason Naganori 正四位下行左近衛権少将藤原朝臣修範
Round Nine
Left
すみのえのこほりとみゆる月かげにとけやしぬらむかみのこころも
| suminoe no kōri to miyuru tsukikage ni toke ya shinuramu kami no kokoro mo | At Suminoe As ice appears The moonlight, but Is not, perhaps, melted Even the deity’s heart? |
Lord Fujiwara no Kinshige
Senior Fourth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[1]
17
Right (Win)
すみよしのおまへのきしのまつのはもかずかくれなくみゆる月かげ
| sumiyoshi no omae no kishi no matsu no ha mo kazu kakurenaku miyuru tsukikage | At Sumiyoshi On the coast before the shrine Even the pine needles Cannot hide their numbers, Appearing in the moonlight. |
Venerable Dharma Eye Enjitsu[2]
18
While in the Left ‘ice appears’ and ‘is not, perhaps, melted’ seem to have some kind of linkage, if we consider this as a Cathay-style poem saying ‘A chill night’s moon / Ice atop the swell’, then I would have preferred it to say ‘is, perhaps, bound’. An alternative version of this would, of course, be ‘A spring morn’s breeze / Ice on the eastern shore’ which could lead to ‘is not, perhaps, melted’, I think. The Right has ‘On the coast before the shrine / Even the pine needles’ and through this type of linkage expresses the brightness of the moon. While this type of smug-sounding expression also appeared in the round before last, the moon here does seem bright and so I can say that the Right wins.
[1] San’i shōyon’ige Fujiwara ason Kinshige 散位正四位下藤原朝臣公重
[2] Hōgen kashōi Enjitsu 法眼和尚位円実
Round Six
Left (Tie)
すみよしのまつのむらだちかぜさえてしきつのなみにやどる月かげ
| sumiyoshi no matsu no muradachi kaze saete shikitsu no nami ni yadoru tsukikage | At Sumiyoshi The pines crowd together In the chilly wind, as Upon the waves at Shikitsu Lodges moonlight. |
Lord Fujiwara no Sane’ie
Supernumerary Middle Captain of the Inner Palace Guards, Right Division
Exalted Junior Third Rank[1]
11
Right
なにはえのそこにやどれる月をみてまたすみのぼるわがこころかな
| naniwae no soko ni yadoreru tsuki o mite mata suminoboru wa ga kokoro kana | At Naniwa Bay, Lodged on the bottom, The moon fills my gaze, as Once more, clearly soars My heart! |
Lord Fujiwara no Atsuyori
Junior Fifth Rank, Upper Grade
Without Office[2]
12
In the Left’s poem, I can say that the configuration of ‘Upon the waves at Shikitsu / Lodges moonlight’ is pleasant. In the Right’s poem, saying ‘Lodged on the bottom, / The moon fills my gaze, as / Once more, clearly soars / My heart!’ appears to show deep thought but, while it appears that ‘Naniwa Bay’ encompasses Sumiyoshi, the conception of the topic expressing ‘over the shrine’ sounds somewhat vague. Then again, the Left’s tone is more in keeping with a poem for a poetry match, but it lacks any language particularly evocative of the topic, so the round ties.
[1] Jūsan’i-gyō ukon gonchūjō Fujiwara ason Sane’ie 従三位行右近衛権中将藤原朝臣実家
[2] San’i jūgoige Fujiwara ason Atsuyori 散位従五位上藤原朝臣敦頼
Round Five
Left (Win)
ゆふかくるここちこそすれすみよしのまつのこずゑをてらす月かげ
| yū kakuru kokochi koso sure sumiyoshi no matsu no kozue o terasu tsukikage | All hung with sacred streamers I feel they are— At Sumiyoshi The treetops of the pines Shining in the moonlight. |
Lord Fujiwara no Shigenori
Captain of the Outer Palace Guards, Left Division
Exalted Senior Third Rank[1]
9
Right
すみよしのまつのこずゑをみわたせばこよひぞかくる月のしらゆふ
| sumiyoshi no matsu no kozue o miwataseba koyoi zo kakuru tsuki no shirayū | When, at Sumiyoshi Over the treetops of the pines I pass my gaze, Hung are they, this midnight With the moon’s white sacred streamers… |
Lord Fujiwara no Morikata
Junior Fourth Rank, Lower Grade
Without Office[2]
10
Left and Right have produced poems on the moon, both with the conception of it resembling white sacred streamers hung on the treetops of the pines, while the differences between them are charming, it does not sound as if the poem of the Right has any reason for singling out ‘this midnight’, while nothing appears lacking in the beauty of the Left’s work and thus, once more, it wins.
[1] Shōsan’i-gyō sahyōe no kami Fujiwara ason Shigenori 正三位行左兵衛督藤原朝臣成範
[2] San’i jūshi’ige Fujiwara ason Morikata 散位従四位下藤原朝臣盛方
Round Four
Left (Win)
月かげはさえにけらしなかみがきやよるべのみづにつららゐるまで
| tsukikage wa saenikerashina kamigaki ya yorube no mizu ni tsurara’iru made | The moonlight Seems so chill, that In the sacred grounds Jars of proffered water Are rimmed with icicles… |
Lord Fujiwara no Kiyosuke
Junior Fourth Rank, Upper Grade
Without Office[1]
7
Right
つきかげにかなづるきねがころもではゆきをめぐらすここちこそすれ
| tsukikage ni kanazuru kine ga koromode wa yuki o megurasu kokochi koso sure | In the moonlight Dancing, the priests’ Sleeves Stir the snow— That’s how I feel… |
Lord Consultant Fujiwara no Sanetsuna
Major Controller of the Left
Chief Inspector of the Records of Outgoing Officials
Supernumerary Governor of Awa
Exalted Junior Third Rank[1]
8
In the Left’s poem, the expression ‘Jars of proffered water / Are rimmed with icicles’ appears to make for a pleasant sequence but seems to have some dubious elements. First of all, I am aware that ‘proffered water’ is mentioned in the Tale of Genji in a poem on the day of the Kamo Festival: ‘That may be, but / Even in the jars of proffered water / Might not appear’[3], but beyond that, it is not used in prior poetry.[i] The water here sounds rather crude to these ears of mine; when one is using figurative language, although it seems possible to do so about any shrine, when referring to the moon before this one, to ignore a description of ice upon the surface of the sea or the beach being spread with pure white gemstones and simply to focus on ‘jars of proffered water’ and say one feels it ‘seems so chill’—well, I do wonder about that! As for the Right’s poem, the movements of a dance have long been described as ‘flurrying snow’ in the poetry of Cathay and now here we have the moonlight appearing to ‘stir the snow’—the conception here appears truly charming, but then we have the section saying ‘Dancing, the priests’: while it’s not that this turn of phrase has never been used before, it does not sound particularly elegant. While the Left does have vague sections, its configuration as a whole is fine. Thus, I think it has to win once more.
[1] San’i jūyon’i-jō Fujiwara ason Kiyosuke 散位従四位上藤原朝臣清輔
[2] Sangi jūsan’i-gyō sadaiben ken kageyu no kami awa gonkami Fujiwara ason Sanetsuna 参議従三位行左大弁兼勘解由長官阿波権守藤原朝臣実綱
[3] This poem appears in Maboroshi 幻, the forty-first chapter of the Tale of Genji (Genji monogatari 源氏物語). It is spoken by Chūjō, one of Genji’s ladies-in-waiting, after he has found her asleep, with her clothing in disorder one morning and flirtatiously suggested, as she has struggled to get dressed, that it has been so long since he has made love that he has forgotten how. She replies: さもこそはよるべの水に水草ゐめけふのかざしよ名さへ忘るる sa mo koso wa / yorube no mizu ni / mizukusa ime / kyō no kazashi yo / na sae wasururu ‘That may be, but / In the jars of proffered water / Waterweed grows old, perhaps, yet / To say that the blossom in your hair today / Has had its name forgotten? Really…’ (Genji monogatari 573). Genji is charmed by this reply and the narrator dryly notes, ‘He seemed not to have rejected her at least’ (Tyler 2001, 773) (hitori bakari wa oboshihanatanu keshiki nari 一人ばかりをば思し放たぬけしきなり (Imaizumi, Mori, and Wokazaki 1976, 872)). The version of the poem Shunzei quotes comes from an alternate version of the Genji text, which is now not regarded as authoritative.
[i] Kubota et al. (2024, 427) note that Shunzei is mistaken here, as there are prior examples of related expressions’ usage, by Izumi Shikibu, among others. For example: …she folded some paper into the shape of an offering, wrote this upon it and sent it.神かけてきみはあらがふたれかさはよるべにたまる水といひける kami kakete / kimi wa aragau / tare ka sa wa / yorube ni tamaru / mizu to iikeru ‘Before the Gods / My Lord, dispute with you / Who would? ‘Twould be as / Proffered jars filling / With water…’ (Izumi Shikibu-shū 109).
