Left
あはぬまは琴柱も知らずひく琴の聞きにくきまで音にや立ててむ
awanu ma wa
kotoji mo shirazu
hiku kono no
kikinikuki made
ne ni ya tatetemu |
Yet untuned, and
Ignorant of where to place the bridge,
Playing such a zither is
Hard to hear, as
Are my constant sobs, perhaps… |
Lord Kanemune
1097
Right (Win)
松風も琴のしらべに通ふなりわがひとり寝ぞ逢ふよしもなき
matsukaze mo
koto no shirabe ni
kayou nari
wa ga hitorine zo
au yoshi mo naki |
The wind in the pines, as
Zithers’ harmony
Does blend;
Yet I am sleeping solo, with
No cause to meet at all… |
Lord Tsune’ie
1098
The Right state: the Left’s poem is preposterous. The Left state: the Right’s poem has no faults to mention.
In judgement: the Left’s poem seems to be aping the style of the Left in the previous round. As for the Right’s poem, although ‘zithers’ harmony’ (koto no shirabe) sounds modern, it is in a standard style. It should win.
Left
恋妻はあらぬしらべしらべの琴の緒かあふことかたき音のみ絶えせぬ
koizuma wa
aranu shirabe no
koto no o ka
au koto kataki
ne nomi taesenu |
My beloved wife:
Is it that untuned are
Our zithers’ strings?
So there is no harmony, and
Only my sobs are ceaseless… |
Lord Suetsune
1095
Right (Win)
松風に通ふと聞きし琴の音も物思ふ時は身にぞしみける
matsukaze ni
kayou to kikishi
koto no ne mo
mono’omou toki wa
mi ni zo shimikeru |
The wind in the pines
Resembles, I had heard,
A zither’s strains that, too,
When sunk in gloomy thought
Dye one so deeply… |
Jakuren
1096
The Right state: saying ‘our zithers’ strings?’ (koto no o ka) is unsatisfactory. The Left state: if one is not depressed, would one not be deeply affected?
In judgement: the Left certainly sounds as if something is out of tune! The Right’s poem says that on hearing the wind pass through the pine trees, one would be affected. It sounds by no means distant from the topic. Thus, the Right wins.
Left (Win).
なぐさめし月にもはてはねをぞ泣く戀やむなしき空に滿つらん
nagusameshi
tsuki ni mo hate wa
ne o zo naku
koi ya munashiki
sora ni mitsuran |
Comforted was I once by
The moon, but at the end
My sobs
For love, the vast spaces of
The heavens do seem to fill… |
Kenshō
901
Right.
月よなをくまこそなけれかきくらす戀の涙は雨と降れども
tsuki yo nao
kuma koso nakare
kakikurasu
koi no namida wa
ame to furedomo |
O, Moon! Before
You there is not a cloud, yet
Dimmed
With tears for love
The rain does fall… |
Lord Takanobu.
902
The Right state: we find no faults to mention in the Left’s poem. The Left state: in the Right’s poem ‘O, Moon! Before’ (tsuki ya nao) is somewhat grating on the ear. In addition, the final section is clichéd.
In judgement: in the Left’s poem, ‘The moon, but at the end’ (tsuki ni mo hate wa) is certainly elegant. The Right’s poem begin’s ‘O, Moon!’ (tsuki yo) but lacks anything connected to it at the end. Thus, the Left must win.
'Simply moving and elegant'