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Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn III: 24

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Left (Win).

霜結ぶ秋の末葉の小篠原風には露のこぼれしものを

shimo musubu
aki no sueba no
ozasawara
kaze ni wa tsuyu no
koboreshi mono o		 Bound with frost
Are the leaf-tips of
The dwarf-bamboo grove, from where
The wind flung dewdrops
Once…

A Servant Girl.

467

Right.

月見れば霜に光を添へてけり秋の末葉の有明の空

tsuki mireba
shimo ni hikari o
soetekeri
aki no sueba no
ariake no sora		 Looking at the moon,
Its light the frostfall
Has touched,
Autumn’s last leaf
From the dawning sky…

Lord Takanobu.

468

The Right state that, ‘If it were ‘dewdrops flung by the wind’ (tsuyu wa kaze ni koboreshi), the conception [kokoro] of the Left’s poem would be easier to understand.’ The Left respond that, ‘The meanings of both are identical. However, in the Right’s poem it is not clear what the ‘last leaf’ (sueba) is.’

Shunzei’s judgement: ‘The Right’s poem, in addition to the expression ‘autumn’s last leaf’ having no clear referent, shows a weakness of conception [kokoro sukunaku kikoyu] with ‘looking at the moon’ (tsuki mireba). The Left, progressing from, ‘bound with frost’ (shimo musubu) to ‘leaf tips’ (sueba) and then ‘dwarf-bamboo grove’ (ozasawara) sounds most fine [yoroshiku kikokyu]. Thus, the Left must win.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn III: 22

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Left.

蟲の音の弱るもしるく淺茅生に今朝は寒けくはだれ霜降る

mushi no ne no
yowaru mo shiruku
asajū ni
kesa wa samukeku
hadare shimo furu		 The insects’ cries
Have plainly weakened;
Cogon grass, where
On this chilly morning
Patchy frost has fallen.

Lord Ari’ie.

463

Right.

思ふより又あはれは重ねけり露に霜置く庭の蓬生

omou yori
mata aware wa
kasanekeri
tsuyu ni shimo oku
niwa no yomogyū		 I feel
Yet more sadness
Laid upon me:
Upon the dew has frost fallen
In my tangled mugwort garden…

Jakuren.

464

The Right find no fault with the Left’s poem. The Left wonder about the appropriateness of ‘upon the dew has frost fallen’ (tsuyu ni shimo oku).

The Right respond, ‘This refers to when frost falls upon something where dew has already fallen.’ In reply, the Left say, ‘Surely, it is when both of them fall together. We do wonder about frost falling on top of dew.’

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem has an unclear link between its initial and final sections. On the matter of the Right’s ‘frosty dew’, this has the same sense as in the Right’s poem in the previous round. The dew has frozen into frost, surely? However, as the Left’s poem is not worthy of a victory, the round must tie.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn III: 21

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Left (Win).

とけて寢ぬ夢路も霜に結ぼゝれ先知る物は片敷きの袖

tokete nenu
yumeji mo shimo ni
musubōre
mazu shiru mono wa
katashiki no sode		 Falling into sleep
Even my dreams are with frost
Filled, and
First to know it are
My lonely sleeves…

Lord Sada’ie.

461

Right.

秋の野の千草の色も枯れあへぬに露置きこむる夜半の初霜

aki no no no
chigusa no iro mo
kare’aenu ni
tsuyu okikomuru
yowa no hatsujimo		 The autumn fields
Myriad hues
Cannot be completely covered
When drenched with dew,
First frost at midnight.

The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.

462

The Right state that the Left’s poem is ‘difficult to understand completely’ [tashikani kokoroegatashi]. The Left find no fault with the Right’s poem.

Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s ‘even my dreams are with frost’ (yumeji mo shimo ni) sounds pleasant [yoroshiku kikoehaberu]. The Right’s ‘drenched with dew’ (tsuyu okikomuru) is elegant in configuration [sugata wa yū ni kikoehaberu], but it is unclear: is it dew turned to frost being drenched by dew? The Left must win.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn III: 20

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Left.

色變る鴛鴦の毛衣今朝見ずは降るとも知らじ秋の露霜

iro kawaru
oshi no kegoromo
kesa mizu wa
furu tomo shiraji
aki no tsuyujimo		 Colours changing on
The mandarin duckdown:
If I see it not this morning,
I’ll not know that has fallen:
Autumn’s frosty dew!

Kenshō.

459

Right.

霜さゆる蓬が下のきりぎりす聲も枯野に成やしぬらん

shimo sayuru
yomogi ga shita no
kirigirisu
koe mo kareno ni
nari ya shinuran		 Frozen by frost,
Beneath the tangled mugwort
Has the cricket’s
Chirp wearied as the withered fields
Become?

Lord Tsune’ie.

460

The Right say, ‘It sounds as if the Left cannot see frost, unless it’s on a mandarin duck’s down!’
The Left respond, ‘There is the poem ‘the down-clad ducks come to my mind’ (kamo no uwage o omoi koso yare). If one composes a poem about one thing, that’s what one is composing about. As for what the Right have to say in their poem, if one is listening to a cricket’s chirp, how can it be withering away? Dubious! [fushin]’

Shunzei’s judgement: I must say I am doubtful myself about saying frosty dewfall changes the colour of ‘mandarin duckdown’ (oshi no kegoromo). In the Right’s poem, saying, ‘the cricket’s chirp’ (kirigirisu no koe) ‘the withered fields become’ (kareno ni nari ya shinuran) sounds as if one cannot hear it at all. The Left’s use of ‘dew’ (tsuyu), too, seems pointless. The Right has an elegant [yū naru] initial section, but the diction in the final section is dubious [shūku no kotoba fushin ni kikoyu]. I make the round a tie.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn III: 14

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Left (Win).

君が經ん世を九日の今日殊に菊を摘みてぞ年を積むべき

kimi ga hen
yo o kokonoka no
kyō koto ni
kiku o tsumite zo
toshi o tsumubeki		 That you, my Lord, will pass through
The world – on the Ninth –
Today, above all
We pick chrysanthemums that
Your years may pile upon each other.

Lord Ari’ie.

447

Right.

君が世は今日摘む菊に置く露の積もりて淵とならん代までに

kimi ga yo wa
kyō tsumu kiku ni
oku tsuyu no
tsumorite fuchi to
naran yo made ni		 My Lord, your life:
Today, I pluck chrysanthemums
Dropped with dew;
Mount up and a deep, deep pool
Become – until then let life last!

Lord Tsune’ie.

448

The Right have no criticisms to make of the Left’s poem. The Left say that the Right’s overly resembles Lord Toshiyori’s ‘The upper pine branches/Dropped with dew’.

Shunzei’s judgement: In addition to being old-fashioned [furuki], the Right’s poem has ‘life’ (yo) in both its initial and final sections. The Left must win.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn III: 12

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Left (Win).

時分かぬ浪さへ色に泉川柞の杜に嵐吹らし

toki wakanu
nami sae iro ni
izumigawa
hahaso no mori ni
arashi fukurashi		 Ever unchanging,
Even the waves have coloured
On Izumi River;
In the oak groves
Have the wild winds blown.

Lord Sada’ie.

443

Right.

秋深き岩田の小野の柞原下葉は草の露や染らん

aki fukaki
iwata no ono no
hahasowara
shitaba wa kusa no
tsuyu ya somuran		 Autumn’s deep at
Iwata-no-Ono
In the oak groves
Have the lower leaves by grass
Touched dewfall been dyed?

Ietaka.

444

Neither team has any criticisms to make of the other’s poem.

Shunzei’s judgement: The total effect of the Left’s ‘even the waves have coloured on Izumi River’ (nami sae iro in izumigawa) is most superior [sugata wa yū narubeshi]. However, there does not appear to be any element linked to the final section’s ‘wild winds’ (arashi) in the initial part of the poem. The Right has ‘have the lower leaves by grass touched dewfall been dyed?’ (shitaba wa kusa no tsuyu ya somuran), without, in the initial section having an expression like ‘treetops stained by showers’ (kozue wa shigure somu), and I wonder about having the lower leaves on the trees touched by ‘dewfall on the grass’ (kusa no tsuyu). The Left’s ‘have the wild winds blown’ should win.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn II: 11

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Left (Tie).

物思はでかゝる露やは袖に置く眺めてけりな秋の夕暮

mono’omoi wa de
kakaru tsuyu ya wa
sode ni oku
nagametekerina
aki no yūgure		 Without deep thought
Would such dewdrops
Fall upon my sleeves?
No, my gaze has, indeed, been lost
Upon this autumn evening…

A Servant Girl.

381

Right (Tie).

さてもさはいかにかすべき身の憂さを思果つれば秋の夕暮

sate mo sa wa
ika ni kasubeki
mi no usa o
omoihatsureba
aki no yūgure		 And so
How should I escape
From my misery?
I thought t’was done and yet
Am faced with a lonely autumn evening…

Nobusada.

382

Both teams feel the other’s poem is ‘most fine’.

Shunzei’s judgement: Both poems take the topic of ‘Autumn evenings’ and present one type of emotional import before reversing it, making it difficult to judge between them. It would seem arbitrary to assign a winner and loser between such phrases as the Left’s initial section ‘Would such dewdrops fall upon my sleeves?’ (kakaru tsuyu ya wa sode ni oku) and the Right’s final section ‘I thought t’was done and yet am faced with a lonely autumn evening…’ (omoihatsureba aki no yūgure). Thus, the round ties.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn II: 10

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Left (Win).

夕さればそゝや下葉も安からで露は袂に荻の上風

yūsareba
soso ya shitaba mo
yasukarade
tsuyu wa tamoto ni
ogi no uwakaze		 When the evening comes,
Rustling underleaves
Are restless;
Dewdrops on the sleeves:
Wind o’er the silver-grass.

Lord Ari’ie.

379

Right.

暮行けば野邊も一つに露滿ちて蟲の音になる庭の淺茅生

kureyukeba
nobe mo hitotsu ni
tsuyu michite
mushi no ne ni naru
niwa no asajū		 When evening falls
The plains, too, are completely
Dew-drenched;
Insects sing from
The cogon grasses in my garden.

Ietaka.

380

The Right remark that ‘it is not clear what the “underleaves” (shitaba) belong to until the end of the poem’. The Left have a number of criticisms: ‘In the Right’s poem, it sounds as if the “cogon grass” (asaji) becomes “insects”. In addition, the topic of this poem is not “Garden Huts”. Furthermore, the poem lacks any expression conveying the emotional overtones of the topic – particularly with “the plains, too, are completely” (nobe mo hitotsu ni).’

Shunzei’s judgement: It is standard expression to begin a poem with ‘underleaves’, when concluding with ‘silver-grass’ as in the Left’s case. However, ‘rustling’ (sosoya) seems unnecessary in this poem. It seems a rather forced interpretation to think the cogon grass is turning into insects, seeing as this is not something that happens in nature. That this is a poem more suited to the topic of ‘Garden Huts’, though, is an unavoidable fault. So, while I cannot be satisfied with the inclusion of ‘rustling’, the final section of this poem is fine. It wins.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn II: 7

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Left (Win).

秋はなを霧の靡に鹿鳴て花も露けき夕なりけり

aki wa nao
kiri no nabiki ni
shika nakite
hana mo tsuyukeki
yū narikeri		 It truly is autumn –
Through the fluttering mist
Comes the belling of a stag, and
The blooms, too, are dew-drenched
At even time…

Lord Kanemune.

373

Right.

哀をばいかにせよとて入會の聲うち添ふる鹿の音ならん

aware o ba
ika ni seyo tote
iriai no
koe uchi souru
shika no ne naran		 More sad
Than this there’s nothing!
The evening bell
Tolling, accompanied by
The belling of a stag.

Lord Tsune’ie.

374

The Right wonder, ‘In the expression “the blooms, too”, what does the “too” (mo) connect with? In addition, simply finishing the poem “At even time” (yū narikeri) shows a lack of conception.’ The Left counter that, ‘In the Right’s poem, expressions such as “more sad” (aware o ba) and “the belling of a stag” (shika no ne naran) are feeble. In addition, what of having iriai (“evening [bell]”), without explicitly including “bell” (kane)?’

Shunzei’s judgement: While I do wonder about the expression, ‘at even time’, with the inclusion of ‘too’ in the phrase ‘the blooms, too’, there is the impression of unspoken emotional overtones to the poem. The configuration of the first phrase, too, is particularly tasteful. As for the Right’s poem, it is not the case that iriai must always be accompanied by kane (‘bell’) – one can hear the bell in the phrase. However, overall, the Left’s poem gives a stronger impression, and so wins.

Poetry Competition in Six Hundred Rounds

Autumn I: 30

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Left.

朝まだき庭も籬も野分して露をきあがる草の葉もなし

asa madaki
niwa mo magaki mo
nowakishite
tsuyu okiagaru
kusa no ha mo nashi		 At the cusp of dawn
My garden and my fence, too,
After the gales,
Are drenched in dew
Flattened blades of grass – every one.

Lord Ari’ie.

359

Right.

夕間暮むら雲迷ひ吹風に枕定めぬ花の色いろ

yūmagure
muragumo mayoi
fuku kaze ni
makura sadamenu
hana no iroiro		 In the dim dusk light
Crowding clouds confusedly
Blown by the breeze
Unable to rest are all
The many blooms.

Lord Takanobu.

360

The Right state that ‘linking “gales” with “drenched” is a poor expression’, while the Left feel that they have no criticisms of the Right’s poem.

Shunzei, again, broadly agrees: ‘What are we to make of the Left’s poem with a fence left standing in a garden after a gale? The Right’s “crowding clouds confusedly” is fine, indeed. Although the term “pillow” is unsuitable in this context, the Left’s “drenched in dew” cannot possibly be right here, either, and so the Right wins.”