Left (Win).
萩が枝をしがらむ鹿も荒かりし風のねたさに猶しかずけり
| hagi ga eda oshigaramu shika mo arakarishi kaze no netasa ni nao shikazukeri |
Bush clover branches Tangled, are trodden by deer; The wild Wind’s spite O’erthrown. |
349
Right.
女郎花野分の風の荒さには靡きながらも露やこぼるゝ
| ominaeshi nowaki no kaze no arasa ni wa nabikinagaramo tsuyu ya koboruru |
Maidenflowers, In the gusting gales Rage, Trembling, Do they let fall their drops of dew? |
350
The Right wonder, ‘Whether the conception of “autumn gales” is adequately expressed by “wild winds”?’ In response, the Left say, ‘Poems on “autumn gales” are not found in previous ages. But is this not what is intended by poems such as “Wild winds have left behind”? Furthermore, on the gentlemen of the Right’s poem, as “gales” (nowaki) contain the sense of “rage” (arasa ni wa), is it not superfluous? Moreover, in the final section, the poem could refer to any blossom – not just maidenflowers.’
Shunzei states: ‘The Left’s “o’erthrown’ (nao shikazukeri) feels old-fashioned, while the prior section’s “wind’s spite” (kaze no netasa) is more modern. This produces a result akin to seeing a peasant wearing smart shoes, I feel. The Right’s “gales” letting dewdrops fall is so obvious a situation as to be pedestrian. Thus, despite the mis-match between sections in the Left’s poem, it must win.’