Round Five
Left (T – Tie)
つれなさのためしは誰ぞたれにても人なげかせてはてはよしやは
| tsurenasa no tameshi wa ta zo tare nite mo hito nagekasete hate wa yoshi ya wa | For cold cruelty Who is your exemplar? Whoever it might be, Is causing one such grief A good thing, in the end? |
Lord Morotoshi
57
Right (M – Win)
逢ふ事をまつの汀に年ふればしづえに波のかけぬ日ぞなき
| au koto o matsu no migiwa ni toshi fureba shizue ni nami no kakenu hi zo naki | For a meeting Pining by the waters’ edge As the years go by— Lower boughs by waves Washed not on any day, at all… |
Lord Sadanobu
58
Toshiyori states: it is impossible to say that that the configuration and diction of the first poem is anything special. In the second poem, ‘For a meeting / Pining by the waters’ edge’ has poetic qualities, but continuing with ‘Lower boughs by waves / Washed not on any day, at all’ does not seem like a love poem, and if the poet had wanted to allude to tears here, well, it just doesn’t sound like it, does it. The Left has the conception of a Love poem, but it language lacks elegance; the Right is smooth, but has only a faint conception of love, and thus these tie.
Mototoshi states: this poem’s diction is particularly bizarre. What an objectionably unpleasant feeling of love! One does see this in the passage giving the reply by Nakatomi no Tokuin, and then there seems to have been the poem ‘go on then, you creeper’, but that one continues extremely charmingly, while this sounds ghastly. Then ‘For a meeting / Pining by the waters’ edge’, truly is a charming composition, and the subsequent ‘Lower boughs by waves / Washed not on any day, at all’ seems entirely clear. It seems to approach the quality of Komachi’s poem, to me! This is a win for the Right, I have to say.
