kaminazuki mimuro no yama no momijaba mo iro ni idenubeku furu shigure kana
In the Godless Month On Mount Mimuro The autumn leaves Show no hues at all, despite The falling showers!
Lord Morikata 15
Right
かみな月時雨れてわたるたびごとに生田の杜をおもひこそやれ
kaminazuki shigurete wataru tabi goto ni ikuta no mori o omoi koso yare
In the Godless Month Showers pass by and Every time The sacred grove at Ikuta I do recall.
Lord Tadataka 16
Toshiyori states: ‘Godless Month’ is the name given to a specific month of the year. It’s somewhat unclear why one would use ‘Godless Month’ in conjunction with ‘Mount Mimuro’ – is there a prior poem to evidence this? It’s quite normal for lines which would normally have five syllables to be written with six, or those with seven to have eight, and this can sound fine in some cases. Here, though, it does sound obviously excessive and I do wonder about that. The second poem is plainly based on an earlier work, and is not at all clear, but as it has precedent, these two are about the same.
Mototoshi states: neither of these poems appears bad, so I say they tie.
oto ni sae tamoto o nurasu shigure kana maki no itaya ni yowa no nezame ni
Even the sound Does soak my sleeves with A shower Striking my roof of cedar boards, Awaking at midnight…
Lord Sadanobu 13
Right
しぐれとて柞の杜にたちよれば木のはとともに降りかかるかな
shigure tote hahaso no mori ni tachiyoreba ko no ha to tomo ni furikakaru kana
When with a shower’s fall Within the oak forest I head to stand Together with the leaves, It strikes me as it falls!
Lord Munekuni 14
Toshiyori states: the first poem’s composition on one’s sleeves getting soaked on hearing a sound is extremely charming. It sounds like that’s really how it is. The latter poem, too, is smooth, and the final line appears to have had some thought put into it, so I dread having to say that the first poem wins.
Mototoshi states: ‘a shower at midnight upon a roof of cedar boards’ is a particularly superlative image, and that this would drench one’s sleeves is also extremely charming. While ‘the oak forest’ does not appear bad, it’s not that remarkable, and ‘waking at midnight’ is something that certainly occurs, I feel.
samo koso wa maki no mayabuki usukarame moru bakari ni mo utsu shigure kana
Truly, A roof of cedar boughs Seems scanty, for It simply leaks when Struck by a shower!
Lord Morotoshi 11
Right (T – Win)
木の葉のみ染むるかとこそおもひしに時雨は人のみにしみにけり
ko no ha nomi somuru ka to koso omoishi ni shigure wa hito no mi ni shiminikeri
‘Is it the leaves upon the trees alone It dyes?’ I wondered once, but A shower on folk’s Flesh does leave a mark…
Lord Masamitsu 12
Toshiyori states: the first poem deliberately starts with ‘A roof of cedar boughs’ and then concludes with ‘Struck by a shower’ which is vague. It does sound like the poet might have had ‘the lonely sighing sound of rain beating against my window’ in mind when composing. In any case, this is something which would have been better avoided. If he wished to compose on this sort of thing, and had done so without this element, then the poem would not be unpleasant. As for the Right, well, this does sound somewhat scanty! Still, what kind of colour might the poet’s flesh be marked? If it was the colour of the leaves, then this would be pretentious, wouldn’t it. If he wanted to refer to the hue of the wind in the pines, then why didn’t he say so? As a composition about a shower, though, this sounds slightly better.
Mototoshi states: having such a thin roof of cedar boughs struck by a passing shower feels frightening for the people under it. At the beginning of the world, rain as thick as axles fell, I hear—what a terrifying shower that must have been! The expression ‘rain beating against my window’ occurs in a poem from Cathay, referring, it seems, to rain blown by the wind horizontally striking one’s fence. Thus, it does sound extremely moving to compose about rains striking one’s window and keeping one awake, but, then again, while it’s certainly true that showers dye the treetops on the mountains in all directions, what sort of mark would they leave on a person’s flesh? It sounds like the old tale of the well-warden’s sign, doesn’t it! This round, both poems are about the same.
shigure ni wa suga no ogasa mo mizu morite ochi no tabibito nure ya shinuran
In such a shower A little hat of woven sedge, too, Drips with water; A distant traveller Is drenched, no doubt…
Lady Kazusa 9
Right (M – Win)
霜さえて枯行くをのの岡べなるならの朽葉にしぐれ降るなり
shimo saete kareyuku ono no okabe naru nara no kuchiba ni shigure furu nari
Chill the frost upon The sere meadows on The hillside where Upon the withered oak leaves A shower is falling.
Lord Mototoshi 10
Toshiyori states: In the first poem, ‘drips with water’ is vague. In the second poem, ‘hillside where’ lacks smoothness. What are we to make of ‘withered oak leaves’? If leaves have withered away, then they wouldn’t make any sound, would they. Is this even possible?
Mototoshi states: the diction of ‘In such a shower / A little umbrella of woven sedge, too, / Drips with water’ is something which lacks any prior precedent. ‘Dripping with water’ give the impression of a painted pot with a crack in it, so what kind of shower can this be? It would be more normal to refer to having to shelter beneath one’s sleeves. While it is lacking in any superlative features, I feel that the sound of a shower on withered oak leaves is somewhat more commonplace.
mizutori no aoba no yama ya ika naran kozue o somuru kesa no shigure ni
Waterfowl fly above Aoba Mountain— O, what is to become Of the treetops dyed By this morning’s shower?
Lord Akinaka 7
Right (T – Win)
かきくもり蜑の小ぶねにふく苫の下とほるまで時雨れしにけり
kakikumori ama no obune ni fuku toma no shita tōru made shigureshinikeri
Clouds rake in above The fisher’s tiny boat— Through its rush-woven roof And even beneath A shower has fallen.
Lord Michitsune 8
Toshiyori states: Continuing on from ‘Waterfowl fly above / Aoba Mountain’ with ‘the treetops dyed’ is simple and straightforward. The latter poem’s emphasis on the fisher’s tiny boat is an unexpected expression, yet because it is not a fault, I make this poem the winner.
Mototoshi states: saying ‘Waterfowl fly above / Aoba Mountain’ is extremely hackneyed, yet the poem of the Right has ‘Clouds rake in above / The fisher’s tiny boat— / Through its rush-woven roof’: both spring showers and summer ones, too, are not things which fall constantly, so it is difficult to believe that they could fall ‘even beneath’. So, I have to determine that a shower dyeing the treetops is a little better.
shigure ni wa iro naranu mi no sodegasa mo nurureba kaoru mono ni zo arikeru
When, amidst a shower My colourless Umbrella of sleeves Is soaked, something scented Does it become!
Lady Shōshō 5
Right (M – Win)
冬くれば散りしく庭のならの葉に時雨音なふみ山べのさと
fuyu kureba chirishiku niwa no nara no ha ni shigure oto nau miyamabe no sato
When the winter comes Scattered and spread across the grounds Are oak leaves, Sounding among the showers On this deep mountain estate…
Lord Masakane 6
Toshiyori states: the first poem has ‘my colourless’—does this mean that the garment the poet is wearing is white? Or that the speaker is lacking in passion? If the garment is white, then it’s difficult to say that it changes colours, while if one is lacking in passion, it’s also difficult to see the connection with an umbrella of sleeves being scented. In general, though, the poem’s style is lacking in fault. The second poem appears to have replicated all the faults of an earlier work. While one can certainly say ‘Oak leaves / Scattered and spread’, saying ‘Scattered and spread / Oak leaves’ gives one the feeling that something is out of sequence. This is a bit unreasonable, but because it’s difficult to avoid the faults of its earlier model, I still feel it should lose.
Mototoshi states: one really wants to know what sort of lack there is. The poem says ‘soaked, something scented’, but doesn’t reference an earlier work which, for example, mentions plum blossom. Still, I feel that ‘Sounding among the showers / On this deep mountain’ is conspicuously good.
ayashiku mo shigure ni kaeru tamoto kana ina no kasawara sashite yukedomo
How strange that From the shower I shelter Beneath my sleeves! Though into the umbrella of the dwarf-bamboo groves of Ina Is where I’m heading…
A Court Lady 3
Right
ぬるれども嬉しくもあるか紅葉ばの色増す雨の雫とおもへば
nuredomo ureshiku mo aru ka momijiba no iro masu ame no shizuku to omoeba
Soaked, yet Happy am I! For the scarlet leaves Take on brighter hues with these rain Drops, I feel…
Lord Akikuni 4
Toshiyori states: The first poem’s section on ‘the umbrella of the dwarf-bamboo groves of Ina’ is well expressed, but then is ‘shower I shelter’ referring to clothing? The second poem can be read as meaning that the speaker is happily being soaked by raindrops standing beneath scarlet leaves on one particular day, but getting drenched by any old shower, even if it’s one which stains leaves scarlet is not something that would make one happy and, sounds tedious. Both poems sound vague, so they should tie.
Mototoshi states: ‘the shower I shelter / Beneath my sleeves’ is better than ‘Happy am I!’
yomosugara arashi no oto ni taguitsutsu ko no ha to tomo ni furu shigure kana
All night long The sound of storm winds Is laced With that of leaves and Falling showers!
Lady Settsu, in service to the Empress 1
Right
おぼつかないかにしぐるる空なればうらごの山のかたみなせなる
obotsukana ika ni shigururu sora nareba urago no yama no kataminase naru
How puzzling it is! What sort of shower From the skies is it that Makes Urago Mountain Show such a thing?
Lord Toshiyori 2
Toshiyori states: While the conception and diction of the first poem are not that unusual, it appears to have no errors to indicate. The second poem’s choice of diction—using ‘show such a thing’—is vague: I wonder if when composing about this mountain that’s what one does? Nevertheless, the assembled company have stated that ‘Urago Mountain’ feels unpoetic as a piece of diction, and thus I make the Left the winner.
Mototoshi states: I feel that ‘With that of leaves and / Falling showers!’ is a moving and charming conception, but find it impossible to understand why Urago Mountain should ‘show such a thing’ in the poem of the Right! I have to say that the Left is superior.
[iv]Nyōbō女房: a sobriquet for the sponsor of the contest, Tadamichi.
[v]Akikuni ason顕国朝臣: Minamoto no Akikuni 源顕国 (1083-1121). The eldest son of Minamoto no Kunzane 源国信 (1069-1111); his mother was a daughter of Takashina no Yasunaka 高階泰仲. Like his father Akikuni served Emperor Horikawa and was eventually appointed Minor Captain in the Inner Palace Guards, Left Division and Supernumerary Assistant Master of the Empress Household Office, reaching Junior Fourth Rank, Upper Grade. He was active in the poetic circles of his time and has seven poems included in imperial anthologies, starting with Kin’yōshū.
[vi]Shōshō no kimi Toshiyori no musumi kanpaku-ke nyōbō少将公俊頼朝臣女 関白家女房
[viii]Akinaka ason 顕仲朝臣: Fujiwara no Akinaka 藤原顕仲 (1059-1129). The third son of Fujiwara no Sukenaka藤原資仲 (1021-1087); his mother was a daughter of Minamoto no Tsuneyori 源経頼 (985-1039). Akinaka was adopted by Fujiwara no Moto’ie 藤原基家 (1023-1093). He had a respectable court career for minor member of the Fujiwara house, ending as an Assistant Lieutenant in the Outer Palace Guards, Left Division at Junior Fourth Rank, Lower Grade. He participated in a number of poetic events around this time, and was one of the poets for the Horikawa hyakushu.
[x]Kazusa no kimi上総公 : little is known about this court lady—neither her dates nor her family background have been recorded. All that can be said with certainty is that she was in service to Horikawa’s empress, Atsuko (Tokushi) and was active in poetic events between 1096-1124.
[4] It is relatively unusual for participants in an uta’awase to be listed in rank order along with all their official titles. Kubota et al. (2024, 427) suggest that this is so that in the section of personal grievances, the deity knew who to give priority to in His response.
[5]Jūgoige-gyō kōgōgū gontaishin Fujiwara ason Kunisuke 従五位下行皇后宮権大進藤原朝臣邦輔 (dates unknown). Kunisuke took part in this match, and also the later Hirota-sha uta’awase, but was not considered a sufficiently accomplished poet to warrant inclusion in an imperial anthology. His appointment as reciter here, though, suggests he was thought to have a clear and loud enough voice to perform in public.
[6]Suruga no gonkami jūgoige Fujiwara ason Asamune 駿河権守従五位下藤原朝臣朝宗 (dates unknown): also known by the name Asanaka 朝仲, Asamune took part in this contest, the Hirota-sha uta’awase, and Shunzei included a single poem of his in Senzaishū (V: 375): Composed on the conception of scarlet leaves showing through the pines. 色かへぬ松ふく風のおとはしてちるはははそのもみぢなりけり iro kaenu / matsu fuku kaze no / oto wa shite / chiru wa hahaso no / momiji narikeri ‘Hues unchanging / Pines blown by the wind / Make a sound, but / What scatters are the oaks’ / Scarlet leaves.’
[7]Shōsan’i-gyō kōgōgū taifu ken sakyō taifu Fujiwara ason Toshinari正三位行皇后宮大夫兼右京大夫藤原朝臣俊成 (1114-1204): Better known as Shunzei, he was the most influential poetic figure of his age and ‘probably the most accomplished critic in the history of Japanese poetry’ (Huey 2002, 56). He founded the Mikohidari 御子左 poetic house, whose descendants were to dominate the waka tradition for centuries, while his poetry contest judgements became the model for later critics and judges to follow. See Royston (1974) for a full account of his life and importance.
