Left (Win).
大方の露は干る間ぞ別れける我が袖一つ殘る雫に
ōkata no
tsuyu wa hiruma zo
wakarekeru
wa ga sode hitotsu
nokoru shizuku ni |
In general,
The dew would daytime dry become
While we are parted, but
On my sleeves alone
Remain droplets… |
Lord Sada’ie.
813
Right.
明ぬればひると聞しをいかなれば戀する袖は濡れまさる覧
akenureba
hiru to kikishi o
ika nareba
koisuru sode wa
nuremasaruran |
When daylight comes
Dry they should be, I heard, but
Why is it, then, that
The sleeves of one in love are
So exceedingly damp? |
Lord Tsune’ie.
814
The Right state: the conception of the Left’s poem is somewhat unclear. The Left state: the contents of the Right’s poem are pedestrian.
In judgement: is the conception of the Left’s poem, of the droplets remaining on one’s sleeves throughout the day being dewfall really that unclear? On hearing the Right’s akenureba hiru, I wondered what had happened to the morning? In addition, just having hiru and not hiruma is confusing. The poem does not say enough.
Left.
月を見てしばし思も忘られき晝間ぞ戀の慰めはなき
tsuki o mite
shibashi omoi mo
wasurareki
hiruma zo koi no
nagusame wa naki |
Gazing at the moon
Briefly my sadness
I did forget; but
In the daylight, love is
No consolation, at all. |
Lord Suetsune.
811
Right (Win).
傾かぬ妹が心に日影かな中空にのみ物思ひし
katabukanu
imo ga kokoro ni
hikage kana
nakazora ni nomi
mono’omoi shite |
Not inclining is
My darling’s heart,
Just like this sunshine;
Upon the height of the heavens
Dwell my gloomy thoughts… |
Nobusada.
812
The Right state: the Left’s poem has only ‘daylight’ (hiruma) and no other associated images, which makes it unpleasant on the ear. The Left state: we wonder about ‘Not inclining is my darling’ (katabukanu imo).
In judgement: in addition to the lack of associated images with ‘daylight’, the content of the initial line seems insufficient. Although the Right’s ‘not inclining is my darling’ is a little unclear, it seems as if her feelings are unmoved in any way. This is certainly seems like the conception of the sun being fixed overhead at noon, so the Right should win.
Left.
歸りつる今朝こそあらめいかにこは干る間も知らぬ袖の氣色ぞ
kaeritsuru
kesa koso arame
ika ni ko wa
hiru ma mo shiranu
sode no keshiki zo |
Having come home
This morning, I am certain,
Why is it that
A daytime dry moment is a stranger
To my sleeves? |
Lord Kanemune.
809
Right.
をのづから暮れ行く空を待つ程も頼むことゝは夢路成けり
onozukara
kureyuku sora o
matsu hodo mo
tanomu koto to wa
yumeji narikeri |
While I
For darkening skies
Do wait,
The only thing in which I can place my trust
Is the path of dreams. |
Jakuren.
810
The Right state: we find no particular faults to mention. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of placing one’s trust in dreams during the daytime. Was he having a nap?
In judgement: the conception of the Left’s poem is well developed from beginning to end. The Right’s poem has an elegant configuration, but it is unacceptable to have the speaker napping. However, the Left’s ‘Why is it that’ (ika ni ko wa) is unsatisfactory style. I have to say the poems are equal and tie.
Left.
巳に過ぎて午こそ物は悲しけれ戀や未の歩み成らむ
mi ni sugite
muma koso mono wa
kanashikere
koi ya hitsuji no
ayuminaramu |
More than I can bear, past the hour of the snake,
The hour of the horse is
All the more sad;
Love is like a sheep’s
Steps to the slaughter… |
Kenshō.
807
Right (Win).
命さへ身の終りにや成ぬらん今日暮すべき心地こそせぬ
inochi sae
mi no owari ni ya
narinuran
kyō kurasubeki
kokochi koso senu |
Has my very life
At the hour of snake, its end
Reached?
That I should live throughout this day,
Is something I cannot bear… |
Lord Takanobu.
808
The Right state: we cannot admire the Left’s poem. The Left state: in the Right’s poem ‘Has my very life at the hour of snake, its end’ (inochi sae mi no owari) sounds as if it is referring to two different matters.
In judgement: the Left’s poem simply says that after the hour of the snake comes the hour of the horse. It is unnecessary to say such things. The final line certainly seems to have nothing to do with anything. As for the fault of the Right’s poem, ‘life’ and ‘self’ have always had different meanings. Its first line, too, sounds elegant. Once more, the Right should win.
Left.
物思へばひま行く駒も忘られてくらす涙を先おさふらん
mono’omoeba
hima yuku koma mo
wasurarete
kurasu namida o
mazu osauran |
Sunk in gloomy thought,
That the hours had flown so fast
I did forget;
First, the tears shadowing my sight
I should suppress… |
A Servant Girl.
805
Right (Win).
人知れぬ戀忘れ貝拾ひかね塩の干る間も袖は濡れけり
hito shirenu
koi wasuregai
hiroikane
shio no hiru ma mo
sode wa nurekeri |
Unknown to all is
My love, and a forgotten mussel shell
I could not find, so
Even when the beach is daytime dry
My sleeves are soaked. |
The Provisional Master of the Empress’ Household Office.
806
The Right state: while ‘shadowed’ (kakikurasu) is a normal turn of phrase, we find ‘tears shadowing my sight’ (kurasu namida) to be unsatisfactory. The Left state: we wonder about the appropriateness of using shio no hiru ma alone for a play on words with hiru.
In judgement: The Left’s ‘That the hours had flown so fast I did forget’ (hima yuku koma mo wasurarete) gives the impression that the conception of the poem ought to be of waiting for dusk, but ‘First, the tears shadowing my sight I should suppress’ (kurasu namida o mazu osauran) seems to be something entirely different. As for the Right’s ‘Even when the beach is daytime dry my sleeves are soaked’ (shio no hiru ma mo sode wa nurekeri), I ask you, how can you think daytime isn’t a part of the phrase? The Right must win.
'Simply moving and elegant'