In judgement: the Left’s ‘in places other than my sleeves’ (sode yori hoka ni) is a little old-fashioned. It does not win over the Right’s ‘thousand times’
The Gentlemen of the Right state: we find no faults in the Left’s poem – other than the excessive repetition! The Gentlemen of the Left state: we find no faults in the Right’s poem.
Shunzei’s judgement: the Left demonstrates the sadness of the present parting compare to that from a stranger, while the Right expresses the pain of the present parting by comparison with a morning after. Once again, these are of the same quality, lacking particular faults or noteworthy elements, and thus the round ties.
Left and Right together state they find no faults worth mentioning.
Shunzei’s judgement: the Left seems to have taken a poem saying ‘truth has broken not, and now we meet again’ (shin’nyo kuchisezu aimitsuru kana) and deepened the conception. The Right, wearing clothes night after night and not thinking it would ‘become real’ (utsutsu made) seems a rather pointless activity. The poems are of the same quality.
Shunzei’s judgement: the Left’s ‘upon my sleeves’ (sode ni mite) seems to go well with the conception, but that conception itself is not expressed in the poem’s diction. The Right’s ‘for what should I sigh?’ simply expresses the conception in its diction. They are of the same quality and should tie.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: there is nothing particularly at fault with the Left’s poem. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem is not that good.
Shunzei’s judgement: mentioning ‘the clouds close by’ (atari no kumo) and ‘remain so briefly –as does life’ (shibashi mo tomaru inochi) gives both poems a sense of pathos. I would say they are of the same quality.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: we have nothing in particular to say about the Left’s poem. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem has nothing unusual in its conception, and additionally, the initial line is grating, even though this is something which has long been composed about.
Shunzei’s judgement: just as the Gentlemen of the Left have said, the Right’s poem contains too many similar expressions. The Left’s poem, while it sounds like the poet has no care beyond the present night, should win.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: saying simply ‘dusk’ (tasogare) when it should be ‘the hour of dusk’ (tasogare toki) sounds somewhat strange. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem is composed to recall the Kokinshū’s ‘A mountain cherry through the drifting mists’ (yamazakura kasumi no ma yori), but is inferior to the original.
Shunzei’s judgement: in regard to the Left’s poem, it is certainly the case that, even without the ‘hour’, ‘in the dusk’ is a standard expression. The Right’s poem sounds old-fashioned. The Left, though, does not sound unpleasant, even though its mentioning of ‘never will I forget’ (wasurezu yo) recollects ‘a tiled kiln’. It should win.
The Gentlemen of the Right state: the use of the diction of ‘description’ (arisama) in the Left’s poem is inappropriate for the style of the poem. The Gentlemen of the Left state: the Right’s poem is no more than a pedestrian poem on homeward-bound geese.
Shunzei’s judgement: The Left certainly does sound most mundane and unpoetic. As for the Right, while it seems like an evocative poem addressed to the topic of homeward-bound geese, is it not difficult for geese, or people, to leave behind their cries? In addition, it is unclear what sort of thoughts it is that occupy the poet. Both poems’ style lacks clarity. Thus, they are comparable and the round must tie.
The Gentlemen of both Left and Right state: the final section of the other team’s poem is not bad.
Shunzei’s judgement: while I feel that the conception and diction of both poems seems fine [sugata kotoba yoroshiku miehaberu], the Right’s heart, flitting off to someone quite plainly, seems rather frivolous. The Left’s ‘beneath the moss’ (koke no shita ni ya) closely resembles the conception of the topic. It should win.