Left.
祝ひ置きてなを長月と契かな今日摘む菊の末の白露
| iwaiokite nao nagatsuki to chigiri kana kyō tsumu kiku no sue no shiratsuyu |
Celebrating: To have yet more long life, Is the vow, with White dewdrops from the tips Of today’s plucked chrysanthemums… |
451
Right (Win).
君が經ん代を長月のかざしとて今日折り得たる白菊の花
| kimi ga hen yo o nagatsuki no kazashi tote kyō orietaru shiragiku no hana |
That my Lord will pass through Ages more, for the Longest Month Our garland will be Picked on this very day, White chrysanthemum blooms! |
452
Neither team can find any fault with the other’s poem this round.
Shunzei’s judgement: The Left’s poem is excellent in both diction and overall configuration [sugata kotoba yū narubeshi]. Although the Right’s fine phrase [shūku] ‘picked on this very day’ (kyō orietaru) is somewhat archaic [koto furite] and I am unable to appreciate it, the Left’s poem, however, sounds as if it were a poem praying for one’s own long life. The Right, though, celebrates for one’s Lord, and so must win.