五月雨は水上まさる泉川笠置の山も雲隠れつつ
| samidare wa minakami masaru izumigawa kasaki no yama mo kumogakuretsutsu |
In the drizzling rain The waters are high Upon the River Izumi; Mount Kasagi, too, Is hidden by the clouds. |
Fujiwara no Shunzei
藤原俊成
Tag Archives: clouds
Kokin rokujō II: 861
Sankashū 361
SIS XVII: 1089
Eikyū hyakushu 223
Eikyū hyakushu 218
Love VI: 12
Left (Tie).
君がりと浮きぬる心まよふらん雲はいくへぞ空の通ひ路
| kimigari to ukinuru kokoro mayouran kumo wa iku e zo sora no kayoiji |
To your home Drifts my heart In seeming confusion; How may layers must the clouds Pass though on the heavenly paths? |
A Servant Girl.
923
Right.
思やるながめも今は絶えぬとや心をうづむ夕暮の雲
| omoiyaru nagame mo ima wa taenu to ya kokoro o uzumu yūgure no sora |
Lost in thought I gazed at you, but now Is it that it’s done that Buries my heart beneath The evening skies? |
Ietaka.
924
The Right state: we would have preferred it to have been ‘is it that my heart drifts?’ (ukinuru kokoro ya). The Left state: the Right’s poem lacks faults.
In judgement: the final sections of both poems seem fine. For strict correctness, the Left should have had ‘my drifting heart does seem confused’ (ukinuru kokoro wa mayourashi), but because this would not fit with the poem, he has left it as ‘in seeming confusion’ (mayouran). The poem is fine as it is, without introducing ‘is it that my heart’ (kokoro ya). I don’t know what to make of the expression ‘to your home’ (kimigari), but ‘how may layers must the clouds pass though on the heavenly paths?’ (kumo wa iku e zo sora no kayoiji) is charming. Then again, the Right’s ‘buries my heart beneath the evening skies?’ (kokoro o uzumu yūgure no sora) has a gentle beauty about it. Thus, the round should tie.
Love VI: 10
Left (Win).
時のまに消えてたなびく白雲のしばしも人に逢ひ見てしかな
| toki no ma ni kiete tanabiku shirakumo no shibashi mo hito ni aimiteshi kana |
In just a moment They vanish, wisping: The white clouds’ Brief span O, that I could meet her for so long! |
Lord Sada’ie.
919
Right.
あくがるゝ心も空に日數へて雲に宿かる物思ひ哉
| akugaruru kokoro mo sora ni hikazu hete kumo ni yado karu mono’omoi kana |
Wandering from my breast My heart within the skies Has passed the days Taking lodging in clouds The focus of my thoughts… |
The Supernumerary Master of the Empress Household Office.
920
The Right state: we find no faults to mention in the Left’s poem. The Left state: the Right’s poem simply re-states a famous creation by another of the Gentlemen of the Right.
In judgement: ‘taking lodging in clouds’ (kumo ni yado karu) does, indeed, sound most like something I have heard recently. Perhaps it is simply that, having heard a good phrase, the gentleman has reused it. Whatever the facts of the matter, it lacks novelty. The Left’s ‘brief span’ (shibashi mo hito ni) should win.
Love VI: 9
Left.
戀わびて心空なる浮雲や行衛も知らずはてはなるべき
| koi wabite kokoro sora naru ukigumo ya yukue mo shirazu hate ha narubeki |
Suffering with love My heart is as the sky-bound Drifting clouds: In some unknown place Is where it will end… |
Lord Kanemune.
917
Right (Win).
戀死ぬるよはの煙の雲とならば君が宿にやわきてしぐれん
| koi shinuru yowa no kemuri no kumo to naraba kimi ga yado ni ya wakite shiguren |
Should I die of love, and Final smoke Clouds become, To your dwelling will I Drift and descend? |
Nobusada.
918
The Right state: does the Left’s poem really expresses the love of drifting clouds? The Left state: the Right’s poem is more suited to the topic of ‘Love and Smoke’.
In judgement: with regard to the Left’s poem, Lady Sagami’s poem from the Eishō Imperial Palace Poetry Competition: ‘Before I know it/In my heart, sky-bound/is my love’ (itsu to naku/kokoro sora naru/wa ga koi ya) would be a good prior example, but this poem inserts ‘drifting clouds’ (ukigumo ya), which is illogical. As for the Right’s poem, ‘To your dwelling will I drift and descend?’ (kimi ga yado ni ya wakite shiguren) sounds fine. Thus, and for this reason, the Right wins.
GSIS X: 541
A poem composed after the cremation of Cloistered Retired Emperor En’yū at Murasakino, when recalling how His Majesty had travelled there for the Day of the Rat the year before.
紫野雲のかけても思ひきや春の霞になして見むとは
| murasaki no kumo no kaketemo omoFiki ya Faru no kasumi ni nasite mimu to Fa |
At Murasakino Clouds covering all Did I recall? The haze of spring Have they become when I see them now… |
Major Captain of the Left [Fujiwara no] Asamitsu
左大将[藤原]朝光