Old Folk 老人
くろかみも色かはりゆきみる人のいとふばかりにおいにけるかな
| kurokami mo iro kawariyuki miru hito no itou bakari ni oinikeru kana | My raven tresses’ Hue has changed with the snow, and Folk who see Simply avoid me with distaste – Such is having grown old! |
Daishin
Tag Archives: hue
Eikyū hyakushu 600
KKS I: 57
Grieving that he had grown old, while seated beneath the cherry blossoms.
色も香もおなじ昔にさくらめど年ふる人ぞあらたまりける
| iro mo ka mo onadi mukasi ni sakuramedo tosi Furu Fito zo aratamarikeru | In both hue and scent Just as in days long gone Do they seem to bloom, yet A man with years laid upon him Has changed beyond all measure. |
Ki no Tomonori
Love IX: 24
Left (Win)
からあひの八入の衣色深くなどあながちにつらき心ぞ
| kara’ai no yashio no koromo iro fukaku nado anagachi ni tsuraki kokoro zo |
Deepest indigo Dipped many times, my robe’s Hue is dark, indeed; Why, with such heartless Cruelty am I treated… |
Lord Suetsune
1127
Right
衣衣にうつりし色はあだなれど心ぞ深き忍ぶもぢずり
| kinuginu ni utsurishi iro wa ada naredo kokoro zo fukaki shinobu mojizuri |
My robe’s Hues have shifted; Faithless is she, yet My heart’s depths Are stained with fern-patterned longing… |
Lord Takanobu
1128
The Right state: we wonder whether ‘deepest indigo dipped many times’ (kara’ai no yashio) should not be scarlet. How dark would the colour be then? In response: there is no possibility of interpreting this as scarlet. We have used deep indigo, so what is there to criticise in then using dark? The Left state: while we understand the conception of the poem, we feel the expression is somewhat lacking. ‘My heart’s depths are stained with secret longing’ (kokoro zo fukaki shinobu mojizuri) does not link well with the initial part of the poem.
In judgement: the Left’s initial ‘deepest indigo’ (kara’ai) certainly sounds elegant, and there is no reason to make it scarlet. I also see no reason to fault the use of dark, either. As for the Right, it does not sound as if ‘stained with fern-patterned longing’ (shinobu mojizuri) links with the remainder of the poem – from the beginning to ‘my heart’s depths’ (kokoro zo fukaki). The final ‘stained with fern-patterned longing’ seems to appear abruptly. Deepest indigo should win.
Love IX: 22
Left (Tie)
恋そめし思ひの妻の色ぞそれ見にしむ春の花の衣手
| koisomeshi omoi no tsuma no iro zo sore mi ni shimu haru no hana no koromode |
The first flush of love’s Scarlet passion for her: A hue that Stains the flesh, as spring’s Blossoms do the sleeves… |
Lord Sada’ie
1123
Right
飽かざりしそのうつり香は唐衣恋をすすむる妻にぞ有りける
| akazarishi sono utsurika wa karakoromo koi o susumuru tsuma ni zo arikeru |
I cannot get enough of Her scent transferred to My Cathay robe: Love for her begins With a skirt! |
The Supernumerary Master of the Empress’ Household Office
1124
The Right state: both the conception and diction of the Left’s poem are unclear. The Left state: the Right’s poem, in addition to being commonplace, has ‘begins’ (susumuru) which is unimpressive.
In judgement: in the Left’s poem, while ‘blossoms do the sleeves’ (hana no koromode) is evocative, ‘a hue that’ (iro zo sore) is certainly extremely difficult to understand. In the Right’s poem, both ‘Cathay robe’ (karakoromo) and ‘with a skirt’ (tsuma ni zo arikeru) seem elegant, but I wonder about the impression of ‘her scent transferred’ (sono utsurika) and ‘begins’. It is unclear which poem is superior or inferior, so the round should tie.
MYS X: 2274
On flowers.
臥いまろび恋ひは死ぬともいちしろく色には出でじ朝顔の花
| koimarobi kopi pa sinu tomo itisiroku iro ni pa idezi asagapo no pana |
Writhing I may die of love, yet Remarkably No sign of passion’s hue will show, as on A bellflower bloom. |
Eikyū hyakushu 376
SZS IV: 249
Eikyū hyakushu 300
Love VI: 15
Left.
心あひの風いづかたへ吹かぬらん我には散らす言の葉もなし
| kokoro ai no kaze izukata e fukanuran ware ni wa chirasu koto no ha mo nashi |
This pleasant Breeze: whither Does it blow? To me not one scattered Leaf or word has it delivered. |
Kenshō.
929
Right (Win).
色に出し言の葉もみなかれはてゝ涙を散らす風の音哉
| iro ni idashi koto no ha mo mina karehatete namida o chirasu kaze no oto kana |
The bright hues of passion In these leaves and your words Have all withered away; Tears scattering with The sound of the wind… |
Lord Takanobu.
930
The Right state: ‘Breeze: whither’ (kaze izukata e) seems lacking. The Left state: the Right’s poem has no faults to indicate.
In judgement: in the Left’s poem, I wonder whether ‘breeze: wither’ really is lacking. ‘This pleasant’ (kokoro no ai) would seem to be an expression deriving from ‘At the head of the road’. I seem to recall it coming after ‘In Kofu in Takefu / Will I be’, but that is not a suitable source. The Right’s poem, as the Gentlemen of the Left have said, appears to have no faults. It should win.