Left – Bur Reed
あきのこむとしのををのみくりかへしかぞへてうゑん草のいろいろ
| aki no komu toshi no o o nomi kurikaeshi kazoete uemu kusa no iroiro | Autumn will come To the ending of the year, simply, Time and time again, Counting them will I plant A variety of grasses… |
20
This poem is an acrostic, with ‘bur reed’ (mikuri) contained in nomi kurikaeshi.
Right – Missing
Original
ふるさとのかすがののべのくさもきもはるにふたたびあふことしかな
| furusato no kasuga no nobe no kusa mo ki mo haru ni futatabi au kotoshi kana | At the ancient capital Upon Kasuga’s plain, Grasses and trees, both, Springtime have twice Met this year! [1] |
Mitsune
34
Left (Win)
はるながらまたはるにあふかすがのにおひぬくさきはねたくやあるらん
| haru nagara mata haru ni au kasugano ni oinu kusaki wa netaku ya aruran | ‘Tis spring, but That springtime once more has come To Kasuga Plain, Won’t the grasses and trees growing there Be envied, indeed? |
35
Right
ゆきかへるみちのやどりかかすがののくさきにはなのたびかさぬらむ
| yukikaeru michi no yadori ka kasugano no kusaki ni hana no tabikasanuramu | Is it that arriving and departing, The lodging on spring’s path lies On Kasuga Plain, so On the grasses and trees, blossom Appears time and time again? |
36
[1] This poem occurs in Mitsune-shū (322) with the same headnote as for poem (22), above. It was also included in Shinsenzaishū (X: 980), with the headnote, ‘Composed in place of the Governor of Yamato in Engi 21, on the day when the Kyōgoku Lady of the Bedchamber visited the shrine at Kasuga.’
Round Three
Left (Tie)
おきあかしくまなき月をながむれば野原の草の露もかくれず
| oki’akashi kumanaki tsuki o nagamureba nohara no kusa no tsuyu mo kakurezu | Lying awake ‘til dawn, and Upon the cloudless moon A’gazing— Upon the grasses o’er the plain Not a single dewdrop is concealed. |
Mikawa
53
Right
月をみて心をこよひつくすかなくまなき空は又もこそあれ
| tsuki o mite kokoro o koyoi tsukusu kana kumanaki sora wa mata mo koso are | Seeing the moon, Tonight, my heart Exhausts! The cloudless skies Once more are such! |
Lord Kinshige
54
The Left’s ‘lying awake ‘til dawn, gazing’ suggests that the poet is at their own residence, but then it finally turns out that they are on the plain – what to make of this? It’s also the case that the moon doesn’t necessarily always appear over the plains. This poem should really have included a clearer reason for the poet’s journey. As for the Right, while it isn’t bad, the final line certainly regrettable, so this round is a tie.
Round Eight
Left
やまかぜにしほるる野べの草むらのねやさむしとや鹿の鳴くらん
| yamakaze ni shioruru nobe no kusamura no neya samushi to ya shika no nakuran | The mountain wind Withers the meadow’s Clumps of grasses— Is it his chilly bedchamber That makes the stag cry out? |
Moromitsu
39
Right (Win)
あはれとはねらふさつをも思ふらんをしか妻どふ秋の夕ぐれ
| aware to wa nerau satsuo mo omouran oshika tsumadobu aki no yūgure | ‘How sad,’ The aiming hunter, too, Seems to think, as The stag searches for his mate On an autumn evening… |
Lay Priest Sanekiyo
40
The Left shows no technique from beginning to end, compounded by the fact that, while ‘although the stag does lie’ is a common expression in poetry, ‘bedchamber’ is something I am unaccustomed to hearing. As for the Right, ‘aiming hunter’ is distasteful to hear, but the poem is not bad overall, so it wins.
Round Seven
Left (Tie)
草がくれ見えぬをしかも妻こふる声をばえこそ忍ばざりけれ
| kusagakure mienu oshika mo tsuma kouru koe oba e koso shinobazarikere | Hidden by the grasses, Unseen, the stag, too Longing for his mate, His bell, indeed, is unable To conceal! |
Lord Yorimasa
37
Right
秋の野の花のたもとに置く露や妻よぶしかの涙なるらむ
| aki no no no hana no tamoto ni oku tsuyu ya tsuma yobu shika no namida naruramu | In the autumn meadows, Upon the blossoms’ sleeves Are the fallen dewdrops The stag—calling for his mate— Letting tears fall? |
Narinaka
38
The Left is novel, and the Right charming, respectively. The Right’s poem does have a large number of identical syllables—while this is criticized in the Code of the Creation of Poetry as a ‘whole body fault’, it is not the case that poems containing this defect have not appeared in poetry matches from time to time, and I don’t feel it’s necessary to examine whether there are a large number of similar cases here: such things are simply a style of poetry.
Round Six
Left
草枯のふしどさびしく成りゆけばしかこそ妻もこひしかるらめ
| kusakare no fushido sabishiku nariyukeba shika koso tsuma mo koishikarurame | Among the withered grasses He lies down, yet into lonely sadness Does he sink, so The stag his mate Seems to long for all the more… |
Suketaka
35
Right (Win)
さをしかの声しきるなりみよしののいさかた山に妻やこもれる
| saoshika no koe shikiru nari miyoshino no isakatayama ni tsuma ya komoreru | The stag’s Bell rends my heart— In fair Yoshino On Mount Isakata Is his mate secluded. |
Tōren
36
I don’t believe I have heard a prior instance of the Right’s ‘Isakata Mountain’, have I? In addition, there doesn’t seem to be any reason for its use here. In general, it’s preferable to compose using terms which are familiar. As for the Left’s poem, it sounds as if the stag only cares for his mate when the grasses are withered, but implying that grass only withers in the Ninth and Tenth Months is at variance with the actual period when it happens, isn’t it? Moreover, it is dubious to compose pivoting around the topic—and doing this has been stated to be undesirable in poetry matches. Indeed, I recall that in the Poetry Match at the Palace in the Fields, when someone composed pivoting on ‘maidenflower’, the judge criticized it, saying, ‘it is mangling the words of our land to compose in this manner.’ Thus, although the poem does have a freshness about it, the Right must win, I think.
Round Three
Left
女郎花露もわきてやおきつらんしほれ姿のあてにも有るかな
| ominaeshi tsuyu mo wakite ya okitsuran shioresugata no ate ni mo aru kana | Upon the maidenflowers Might the dew discriminate In its falling? For its dampened form Is so fine! |
Lord Minamoto no Michiyoshi, Minor Captain of the Inner Palace Guards, Right Division
5
Right (Win)
もも草の花もあだにやおもふらんひと色ならずうつす心を
| momokusa no hana mo ada ni ya omouran hito iro narazu utsusu kokoro o | A multitude of grasses Blooms: do they play me false Should I think? For not to one hue alone Is my heart drawn… |
Kojijū, Court Lady to Her Majesty
6
The Left, by saying ‘Might the dew discriminate / In its falling?’ seems to want to describe the way that the flowers’ colours become deeper or fainter. It is not appropriate, however, to use ‘dampened form’ in this way. Furthermore, saying something ‘seems fine’ lacks elegance, doesn’t it. The Right does not lack the conception of the topic, so it should win.
