Tag Archives: hototogisu

Eien narabō uta’awase 09

Round Two

Left

をちかたやくも井の山のほととぎすあまつよそにもなきわたるかな

ochikata ya
kumoi no yama no
hototogisu
ama tsu yoso ni mo
nakiwataru kana
From the distant
Mount within the clouds
A cuckoo
In yonder heavens
Sings his song!

Lord Saburō
17

Right

ほととぎすしのだのもりのしのびねをたづねざりせばいかできかまし

hototogisu
shinoda no mori no
shinobine o
tazunezariseba
ikade kikamashi
A cuckoo
In Shinoda’s sacred grove
Lets out a hushed cry;
Had I not come to visit here,
How might I have heard it?

Ushigimi
18

In regards the poem of the Left’s ‘from the distant’ and what follows, extremely recently and colloquially, at the Nakatomi purification ceremony it seems there was a composition, ‘in the distance, below the trees so lush’. This diction is contrary to the expected style of waka and something which occurs only extremely rarely. Truly, one does not compose using such diction in a poetry match. The poem of the Right has nothing of interest about it, yet it also lack faults to mention, so it wins.

This round, neither poem appears bad. The Left has a novel style, while the Right seems cliched, but its expression is smooth. I wonder if we could see these as a tie.

Eien narabō uta’awase 08

Cuckoos

Round One

Left

ほととぎすまきのとばかりまちつれどなかであけぬる夏のしののめ

hototogisu
maki no to bakari
machitsuredo
nakade akenuru
natsu no shinonome
O, cuckoo,
Briefly by my door of cedar wood
Did I await you, yet
No song, at all, brightened
This summer edge of dawn.

Lord Dainagon
15

Right (Win)

ほととぎすなくうれしさをつつめどもそらにはこゑもとまらざりけり

hototogisu
naku ureshisa o
tsutsumedomo
sora ni wa koe mo
tomarazarikeri
At the cuckoo’s
Song, my joy
To hold fast did I try, yet
In the skies, his cry
Lingered not.

Lord Chūnagon
16

The Left’s poem, after careful consideration, has a graceful style. The diction of the Right’s poem is superb, and there is an excess of conception. Reading and reciting these leaves my aged heart at a loss. Thus, they tie.

In the Left’s poem, ‘briefly’ is an expression which means ‘just for a short time’, I think, and thus the sentiments are lacking. Saying ‘brightened…edge of dawn’ sounds as if the poet has only begun waiting at daybreak. One does see, apparently, a number of poems in prior matches where the poet has not heard the cuckoo. Nevertheless, I do wonder about whether this is appropriate, given that poems where the cuckoo has been heard are faultless. The Right’s poem is not that good, but it is poetic. Thus, it has to win.

Entō ōn’uta’awase 24

Round Twenty-Four

Left (Tie)

覚束なたれきけとてか時鳥さよふけ方の雲に鳴くらん

obotsukana
tare kike tote ka
hototogisu
sayo fukegata no
kumo ni nakuran
I do not understand—
Who is it that you demand hears you,
O, cuckoo?
Toward brief night’s dawn,
Calling from within the clouds…

Tomoshige
47

Right

待ちかねしよはも昔にかはらねばことしもつらし山時鳥

machikaneshi
yowa mo mukashi ni
kawaraneba
kotoshi mo tsurashi
yamahototogisu
Eagerly awaiting
Midnight, to find—as long before—
It all unchanged, so
This year, too, how cruel is
The mountain cuckoo!

Dharma Master Zenshin
48

Both Left and Right sound suitable. So, they should tie.

Entō ōn’uta’awase 23

Round Twenty-Three

Left (Tie)

時鳥山よりをちの里人はまたでや夜半の初音きくらん

hototogisu
yama yori ochi no
satobito wa
matade ya yowa no
hatsune kikuran
O, cuckoo,
Far from the mountains,
Will villagers
Without waiting, at midnight
Ever hear your first cry?

Chikanari
45

Right

うちしめる花橘の五月雨に軒もる夜半のほととぎすかな

uchishimeru
hanatachibana no
samidare ni
noki moru yowa no
hototogisu kana
When utterly drenched is
The orange blossom by
The summer showers.
Dripping from the eaves at midnight is
A cuckoo’s call!

Ie’kiyo
46

The Right’s poem has ‘Dripping from the eaves at midnight is a  cuckoo’s call!’—this sounds like it conveys the conception, but yet is stylistically unclear. The Left’s poem takes up the conception of ‘On the leg-wearying / Mountains’ far side / Folk dwell—I wonder / Do they not have to wait for the autumn / Moon to fill their gaze?’,[1] doesn’t it? Neither has any real point worth making, so they tie.


[1] This poem is: Topic unknown. あしびきの山のあなたにすむ人はまたでや秋の月をみるらんashihiki no / yama no anata ni / sumu hito wa / matade ya aki no / tsuki o miruran Former Emperor Sanjō (SKKS IV: 382).

Entō ōn’uta’awase 22

Round Twenty-Two

Left (Win)

五月雨にやすらふ暮の時鳥そなたの雲に声なへだてそ

samidare ni
yasurau kure no
hototogisu
sonata no kumo ni
koe na hedate so
In a summer shower,
Hesitating, at twilight,
O, cuckoo,
Let not the intervening clouds
Interrupt your song!

Shō
43

Right

過ぎぬなりさやはちぎりし時鳥なく音ばかりはこぞにかはらで

suginunari
saya wa chigirishi
hototogisu
naku ne bakari wa
kozo ni kawarade
And so you’ve flown by—
Is that what you vowed,
O, cuckoo?
For only the sound of your song
Is unchanged from the year before…

Nagatsuna
44

The Left’s poem doesn’t seem bad. The Right poem’s ‘For only the sound of your song is unchanged from the year before’ is somewhat difficult to grasp—if the cuckoo’s call has not changed, then what has? After all, cuckoos have ‘the voice of yesteryear’[1]—among other references—so it’s obvious that their calls don’t change, so the Left is somewhat better, I think.


[1] KKS III: 137

Entō ōn’uta’awase 21

Round Twenty-One

Left (Win)

しがらきの外山の末の郭公たが里ちかき初音なるらん

shigaraki no
toyama no sue no
hototogisu
ta ga sato chikaki
hatsune naruran
In Shigaraki
At the foothills’ end
A cuckoo
By whose estate
Might let out his first cry?

Takasuke
41

Right

橘のにほひを空に尋ねきて山時鳥なかぬ日ぞなき

tachibana no
nioi o sora ni
tazunekite
yamahototogisu
nakanu hi zo naki
Orange blossom’s familiar
Scent within the skies
I seek out, while
The mountain cuckoo
Fails to sing on not a single day…

Shimotsuke
42

The Left poem’s ‘near whose estate does it first call’ does not sound bad. The Right’s poem, too, seems to have no faults to mention, yet the Left still wins by a hair.

Entō ōn’uta’awase 20

Round Twenty

Left (Win)

あけぼのは涙やもろき時鳥なくねにおつる杜の下露

akenbono wa
namida ya moroki
hototogisu
naku ne ni otsuru
mori no shitazuyu
With the dawn
Are you swiftly to tears moved
By the cuckoo’s
Calling cries, falling from
The forest drip dewdrops?

Dōchin
39

Right

今もかも昔やこふる橘の花ちる里になく郭公

ima mo kamo
mukashi ya kouru
tachibana no
hana chiru sato ni
naku hototogisu
I wonder, is she now,
As in days gone by, beloved
Where orange
Blossom falls on the estate—
The calling cuckoo?[1]

Dharma Master Nyokan
40

Both Left and Right are of the same quality, yet I wonder about the sound of the Right poem’s final section, so the Left wins.


[1] An allusive variation on: A poem by the Governor-General of Dazai, Lord Ōtomo. 橘の花散る里の霍公鳥片恋しつつ鳴く日しぞ多き tachibana no / hana chiru sato no / hototogisu / kata koishitsutsu / naku hi shi zo ōki ‘Orange / Blossom scatters round my estate where / The cuckoo / For unrequited love / Does cry on many a day…’ Ōtomo no Tabito (MYS VIII: 1473)

Entō ōn’uta’awase 19

Round Nineteen

Left (Tie)

なれをしぞあはれとはおもふ時鳥あかず過ぎても歳のへぬれば

nare o shizo
aware to wa omou
hototogisu
akazu sugite mo
toshi no henureba
You, indeed, do
Deeply move me
O, cuckoo!
Never sated am I
Through all the passing years…

The Supernumerary Major Counsellor
37

Right

われならで何をうしとか時鳥ことしも雲のよそに鳴くらん

ware narade
nani o ushi to ka
hototogisu
kotoshi mo kumo no
yoso ni nakuran
Not I, but
What is it distresses you so,
O, cuckoo?
That this year, too, from the clouds
Yonder side you seem to sing…

Lord Nobunari
38

Both Left and Right don’t sound bad, so again this is a tie.