Tag Archives: pines

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 39

Round Fourteen

Left

こころあれやかきなくらしそはつしぐれまださしはてずしばのかりいほ

kokoro are ya
kaki na kurashi so
hatsushigure
mada sashihatezu
shiba no kari’io
Have some sympathy,
And bring no darkness,
O, first shower!
For I have yet to finish putting up
My crude brushwood hut…

Lord Suetsune
77

Right (Win)

すみよしのまつがしたねのたびまくらしぐれもかぜにききまがへつつ

sumiyoshi no
matsu ga shita ne no
tabimakura
shigure mo kaze ni
kikimagaetsutsu
At Sumiyoshi
Beneath the pines, their roots are
My journey-pillow, as
The shower, too, with the gusting wind
I hear blending together.

Takanobu
78

The Left’s latter section, which states that the poet has ‘yet to finish putting up’ his hut, has a truly charming configuration as a poem on the conception of travel, but the phrase ‘have some sympathy’ does not appear to be a conception which has prior precedent. It could be a way of expressing the emotion through the shower. As for the Right, while I do question the sound of ‘journey-pillow’, it is the case that in Cathay-style poems this appears, but what are we do to about the fact that this is not ‘pillow on my journey’, I wonder? The sequencing of ‘the shower, too, with the wind’ is pleasant, isn’t it. Thus, I make the Right the winner.

Kinkai wakashū 323

The wind through the pines sounding like a shower

神無月木のはふりにし山里は時雨にまがふ松のかぜかな

kamidazuki
ko no ha furinishi
yamazato wa
shigure ni magau
matsu no kaze kana
In the Godless Month
When all the leaves from the trees have fallen,
In a mountain retreat
Blending with the showers is
The wind in the pines!

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 25

Left (Tie)

まつかぜにふけゆく月のすみのえはなみのよるこそたちまさりけれ

matsukaze ni
fukeyuku tsuki no
suminoe wa
nami o yoru koso
tachimasarikere
The wind through the pines
Blows late upon the moon
At Suminoe, where
The night’s breaking waves
Rise strikingly!

Novice Jakunen[1]
49

Right

しもならで月もるよひやかたそぎのゆきあはぬひまもかみはうれしき

shimo narade
tsuki moru yoi ya
katasogi no
yukiawanu hima mo
kami wa ureshiki
That ‘tis not frost, but
The moon, dripping at night
Through the ridge poles
Unmatched gaps,
Does the Deity feel joy?

Suke, from the Residence of the Former Minister of the Right[2]
50

The Left poem’s ‘Blows late upon the moon / At Suminoe’ sounds pleasant, but there have been recent poems, such as ‘Brings waves–that / I would tell you!’[3] and ‘Simply with the waves / Did seem to draw near with the night’[4] and while the initial section of the poem here differs, basing a poem on this is not that unusual, I think. The tone of the Right’s poem is charming, but it does not seem likely that the Deity would feel joy simply at the moon coming through the gaps in His ridgepoles. The Deity’s power is limitless and wards eighty isles beyond Sumiyoshi—indeed, there is nowhere in Tsumori’s shore or Sumiyoshi beach, above the waves or in the shad of the pines that it does not reach. I have discussed ridgepoles earlier. Nevertheless, the configuration of the poem isn’t bad, so these should tie, I think.


[1] Shami Jakunen 沙弥寂念

[2] Zen-udaijin no ie no Suke前右大臣家佐

[3] 人しれぬ思ひありそのはま風に浪のよるこそいはまほしけれ hito shirenu omoi ariso no hamakaze ni nami no yoru koso iwamahoshikere ‘Unknown to all / My passion burns—toward a rocky / Beach the breeze / Brings waves–that / I would tell you!’ Middle Captain Toshitada (Horikawa-in enjo awase 17/KYS (2) 468/500)

[4] Composed when he was asked by people in the capital what the moon had been like, when he had returned there, after going to Akashi to gaze upon it, at a time when it was particularly bright. 有明の月もあかしの浦風に波ばかりこそよるとみえしか ariake no tsuki mo akashi no urakaze ni nami bakari koso yoru to mieshika ‘The dawntime Moon’s brightness, with Akashi’s / Beach breezes / Simply with the waves / Did seem to draw near with the night…’ Taira no Tadamori (KYS (2) III: 216/KYS (3) III: 212)

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 24

Left

あまくだるかみもひさしくみやゐして月ものどかにすみよしのうら

amakudaru
kami mo hisashiku
miya’ishite
tsuki mo nodoka ni
sumiyoshi no ura
Descending from Heaven,
The Deity, too, eternally
Manifests here, where
The moon, too, is calm
Above the bay of Sumiyoshi.

Venerable Dharma Eye Shōken[1]
47

Right (Win)

かみよよりたぐひなしともすみよしのまつやこよひの月をみるらむ

kamiyo yori
taguinashi tomo
sumiyoshi no
matsu ya koyoi no
tsuki o miruramu
Since the Age of Gods
Is there nothing to compare with,
At Sumiyoshi,
The pines tonight with
The moon filling my gaze?

Novice Jakuchō[2]
48

The Left appears to have a truly charming conception and configuration, but beginning with ‘The Deity, too, eternally’ and then saying ‘The moon, too, is calm’ and repeating the same word is discordant. The Right, in addition to having no particular faults to mention, has an extremely pleasant-sounding configuration with ‘The pines tonight’. Thus, I make this a win for the Right.


[1] Hōgen kashōi Shōkaku 法眼和尚位静賢

[2] Shami Jakuchō沙弥寂超

Sumiyoshi-sha uta’awase kaō ni-nen 23

Left (Tie)

すみよしのきしうつなみにてる月はこかげもあかしまつのむらだち

sumiyoshi no
kishi utsu nami ni
teru tsuki wa
kokage mo akashi
matsu no muradachi
At Sumiyoshi
Upon the waves, striking the shore,
Shines the moon—
The shadows of the trees are bright
Among the crowding pines.

Chūnagon, in service to the Former Ise Virgin[1]
45

Right

としふりてかみさびにけるすみのえのきしのたまもをみがく月かげ

toshi furite
kamisabinikeru
suminoe no
kishi no tamamo o
migaku tsukikage
Ancient in years is
The dread
Suminoe
Shore, where gemweed
Is polished by the moonlight.

Novice Sokaku[2]
46

The Left’s poem has a truly charming conception, with ‘Upon the waves, striking the shore, / Shines the moon’ reflecting and making the pines’ shadows shine. However, what are we to make of the use of ‘bright’ here? My late master once stated that he had too often heard such diction being used. The poem of the right appears to have pleasant configuration and diction, but, while it is only natural to say that the Suminoe’s shore is dread, I wonder about the appropriateness of going so far as to say that gemweed is? It’s going a bit far, I think, to bring in ‘gemweed’ simply to link it to ‘polish’. Nevertheless, the configuration of the poem appears pleasant, so I call this a tie.


[1] Zen-saigū no Chūnagon前斎宮中納言

[2] Shami Sokaku沙弥素覚

Kenreimon’in ukyō no daibu-shū 119

When she had gone to Kamo on a winter’s night when the moon was shining brightly.

神がきや松のあらしもおとさえて霜にしもしく冬の夜のつき

kamigaki ya
matsu no arashi mo
oto saete
shimo ni shimo shiku
fuyu no yo no tsuki
At the sacred grounds,
Storm winds through the pines
Sound so chill;
Frost atop of frost is spread,
The moon this winter’s night.

Kenreimon’in ukyō no daibu

SIS XVI: 1026

On a Day of the Rat, when Major Captain of the Right Sanesuke was lower in rank.

おいの世にかかるみゆきは有りきやとこだかき峯の松にとはばや

oi no yo ni
kakaru miyuki Fa
ariki ya to
kodakaki mine no
matu ni toFaba ya
In ancient ages
Did ever such a progress
Occur?
On the high, tree-covered peak
I would ask the pines…

’Kiyowara no Motosuke